Love of a Fangirl

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Dear love of my life,
You don't know me, but I know you.
I know every single thing of you.
From your first love to your terrible heartbreaks.

I don't know how people call this. And I don't know what to name our relationship.

Admiring you from the corner of the crowd, visiting your Facebook profile everyday and hearting your instagram updates every minute.
Is this called stalking?

To me, it's called love. I sound crazy right?

"You love some one whom you can't have."
This lines are true. So true.

You're my everything when I'm just a fan of yours from this damn big crowd.

But I've smiled at you, winked at you and laughed at you and I even gave air kisses to you.
I photo shopped your pictures with mine, finished preparation for our wedding, chose name for our babies and all.

And on September 15,
I told the whole world that "I love you".
I shouted out loud, but everyone seemed to be not caring.
You were there too.
You were smiling at me,
That made me to pursue my dream.
My dream is you.
You still can't remember that right?
You were busy with your fellow band members.
You didn't hear me
Because I was nothing to you.
I was able to hear your heartbeat.

Sometimes, some things are funny to some people.
Yeah, it may be funny to you and it's actually funny to me too.
I, sometimes be like "I don't wanna love you, hate you, admire you and care for you".

But i can't control myself. I actually want to hate you 'cause you're born this awesome, hot, popular when I'm ugly, stupid and I am a mere wallflower.

But my heart! I can't even control my stupid heart.

I, every time, end up loving you more.

"You'll be always my moon,
And I'll be always your star,
A little star from this big damn sky."

You can't see me
You can't care for me
You can't be there for me
You can't love me
Because I'm a little dark star from the crowd.
It's okay,
Seeing you from far away is enough for me...

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⏰ Last updated: Jan 12, 2020 ⏰

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