Liv's Story

Chapter 2

It took me longer than usual to get myself home. My body was aching and I felt weak, like somebody had taken all my strength or something.

I was angry with myself for letting it happen. I was trained what to do in situations like that but I guess I was in way too much shock. My body completely froze and I just let it continue.

"How much longer did it take you to get home, than your usual time?" asked Alex.

"Bout an hour." I run my hands through my hair.

"Wow!" Alex exclaimed.

"Anyways. Let me carry on."

I arrived home to find my place trashed. Chairs were overturned, drawers were out and had been rifled through. What made me pissed was that my photograph with my mother and I had been torn up in the process, it was the only good moment that I had had with her before she became an alcoholic.

"Sorry babygirl." Elliot pats my back.

"It's fine." I smile.

I didn't want to involve the police, so I tidied the place up myself. At the same time I made sure that nothing was stolen and that everything was in it's correct place.

"Why not involve the police?" asked Alex.

"God, can none of you keep quiet while I tell my story?" I sigh, glaring at Alex.

As I was saying, nothing was stolen and soon my living room was back to normal. But with me moving all furniture back into place, it just made me feel like hell and more tired than what I was.

I was satisfied with the job that I did and decided to take a shower. I needed to get rid of everything that the guy left behind. No later than 15 minutes, I was standing underneath the shower with scorching hot water burning my body. I wanted to get rid of that feeling of him groping me. I remember that a took a scrubbing brush and scrubbed myself so hard that my skin started to go numb.

"I still don't understand why you didn't call us." Nick interrupts again. "I mean, we could've helped you."

"I know you would've helped but I felt the need that I needed to get through this myself." I chuckle lightly. "Guess I was wrong."

You know, after spending about an hour or so in the shower, I felt sorry for myself. Again, that feeling of worthlessness and dirtiness came rushing back as I looked in the mirror.

Tears sprung to my eyes and I quickly wiped them away. I couldn't be weak, not now. I hated when I started feeling weak.

In anger I smashed the mirror and watched as it shattered and fell to the floor. You know, I wanted to do what I used to do when I was younger... Which was self harming.

"Oh my soul! I can't believe you used to self harm." exclaimed Elliot. "You sure as hell learn something new everyday."

"Well, yeah." I shrug.

I gave into temptation and grabbed the biggest, sharpest shard of glass I saw. I placed it on my left wrist, drew in a sharp breath before pushing it deep into my skin. I winced at the pain soon became unbearable but it still felt good.

"Stop!" Amanda groaned. "I can't take anymore of this cutting shit. Don't get me wrong, I sympathise with those who resort to self harm but I just don't like hearing about it."

"I understand." I nod.

Soon after, I cleaned up the glass and put a bandage on my cut. I changed into a long sleeved shirt and climbed into bed. Maybe taking a nap would help.