the beeps were slow. sickeningly slow. tubes ran out of every surface on my skin all doing different jobs. it was a waste.
it was like trying to keep a dead person alive.
that's basically what it was.
he was slouched in the corner in the big blue chair sound asleep. His eyes were red and puffy and he shuddered every few minutes. his skin was pale and tired looking.
it was shameful knowing you were the cause of distress to someone you loved.
i layed in my bed and watched the beautiful boy sleep.
it was peaceful. It seemed like the right time.
i had done what I needed to do. I knew it was going to take me soon anyway, and there was really nothing left to hold onto. I smiled and blew a kiss to the one person i loved and in that moment everything felt ok.
The world around me started to blur. I heard loud, fast beeping and a commotion of people around me. louis jumped up and grabbed my hand. I used every ounce left in me and mouthed "remember me" to him.
i don't really now what happened after that.
nobody truly does know what happens.
i guess I can start from the beginning...
*5 years earlier*
"come on Hunny. The appointment is in 10 minutes and it takes 15 minutes to drive there. We are going to be late. Hurry it up!" My mom yelled from the bottom of the stairs.
i grabbed my dirty white converse and sprinted down the stairs.
"mother i am 19 years old. I don't need your babying."
"I know sweetie i know. Im off to work. I expect a phone call after the checkup. Don't forget. Love you, bye" she kissed my head and ran out slamming the door.
i grabbed my sweater and keys and hopped in the car on my way to the hospital.
i sat in the familiar white room reading my book. Books are the one thing that can take me away from everything. Books and music. That's really all i live for.
i had treatment 1 months ago. I was still doing ok. Im obviously still sick, but at this point i have a chance.
the door opened and Dr Dan walked in cutting me off mid-thought.
"Hello Em. How are you feeling?" He smiled at me leaning against the side desk.
"Fine thank you. No nosebleeds. Nothing."
"Wonderful! Have you been taking your pills?"
"Yes." I hated pills. Any medicines really. All they did was remind me of how sick I was.
"Great. Well just do the regular check up and you can leave."
He carried on with the checkup and i left.
I drove home blasting my music through the stereo. Yes I'm an alternative girl.
i pulled up to the cafe and unplugged my iPhone. I walked through the door and into the back. I got my name tag and apron on and went off.
i worked at this cafe. It's a small local cafe on the corner. I loved working here.
"Hey Em." Josh tickled my sides from behind. He was my best-friend since second grade. He had dark features. He was very cute and funny and smart. We had dated in the 8th grade, but it became too much so we split. He had been my only boyfriend. I loved him, but not in that way.
"Hey dork," I giggled pushing him away from me.
"hey table 5 needs someone; your turn," he pushed me out the door. I laughed at him.
I walked up to the table looking down at my notepad writing, "hello welcome to Jack's Classic what would y'all like today?" I remained writing not looking up.
"ill have a chicken sandwich, bread sticks, hot wings, and a coke." an adorable irish accent rung. I've always been a sucker for accents. I smiled and nodded.
"Ill have a coke also and BLT please," a crisp british accent flooded my ears.
A different voice spoke up, also british but higher then the last, "ill have a Caesar salad and coke please. Thank you ummm.... Emily."
he had read my name tag. I smiled and looked down to him.
I stared at his fluorescent blue eyes. His hair was pushed up into a slight quiff. His white v next hugged his body in all the write places. He was muscular, but not too sickly. The sun reflected off his slightly tanned skin. He was beautiful.
My mouth was slightly agape, "I..um..I thank you."
i quickly turned around after completely embarrassing myself to go place their orders.
that was awful.
the day finally ended and i rushed home. I was about to finish my book. Finally.
after reading for a while i fell asleep. I dreamed about that beautiful boy from the cafe, just not able to get him from my mind.
