The four of us are up in my room. The walls are painted a lavender color with periwinkle, white, and magenta flowers stenciled in each corner of the room. My queen sized bed lays in the far right corner with a small white bedside table next to it that holds a magenta lamp, an alarm clock, and two framed photographs. One of Ariel, Eric, Peter, and I at the Bronx Zoo a month or two before they died, sitting on a large plastic tortoise. The other was one of my father; making a funny face at the camera; I stood beside him with my lips on his cheek and my eyes squeezed shut. My arms were wrapped tightly around him as though I knew I was going to lose him soon but I didn't want to. I didn't want to let go. My bed is covered with a striped comforter that match my walls and several matching pillow cases. On the other side of the room is a large window framed with magenta curtains and a white dresser. Atop of the dresser are more photos of the family, Clarissa, and I. Just memories that haven't come to my brain yet. There are also a lot of things up there that reminded me of my deceased loved ones such as small knick-knacks, and jewelery. On the front wall is my glorious walk in closet, filled with all my many varities of clothing and shoes. I love shoes. On the hardwood floor lay about four fluffy beanbags that match the color sceme and a lavender rug.
I lay on my bed, the stuffed Tyranesauraus Rex Peter gave me as a gift for Christmas last year, is clenched tightly in my arms. Clarissa sits on the floor, with her back against the bed beside me, unfazed by what I had just explained. William and Austin, otherwise, look shocked and symphathetic. I had just explained the accident to the boys. They now know everything.
"Wow," Will sighs. Still shocked from the news. He runs a hand through his hair. "That's rough. I'm so sorry, Jaz. I would of never known. You are my inspiration. You're amazing. I'm quite weak. I wouldn't have been able to deal with all that weight on my shoulders, but you-you are one magnificent girl. Wow. Just wow."
I blush. I didn't expect him to react like this. He even cried a little during the story and Austin had to try and calm him down even though Austin cried a little too. I just can't believe Will found me inspiring. I couldn't see myself as inspiring. I can't deal with all this weight on my shoulders. It's hard to have so much responsibility. It's overwhelming sometimes that I wish I could just walk upstairs and curl up in my bed and cry. But I couldn't go up the stairs without someone's help and I couldn't move my legs enough to curl them up into a ball.
Austin sat there in silence; his head down; his hands shielding his face. He's crying and that breaks my heart.
"Can you give us a minute?" I ask Clarissa who's admiring Will and the statement he just made.
"Yeah. I have to go anyways. My parents want to meet Will so they invited him over for dinner." She stands up and helps Will up as well. "Bye, Jaz. I love you. Text me."
"Bye, Jazmine. Thank you for telling us all that. You really are an inspiration. Good luck with everything." Will pulls me in and wraps me tightly in a hug. He smelled like strawberries.
They then said goodbye to Austin who wouldn't budge. Clarissa gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek goodbye before exiting the room. I sat up on my bed and as I did so, Austin lifts his head and our eyes meet. His light eyes are now bloodshot. The skin around them is puffy and swollen. His cheeks are swollen and stained with tears. His whole face is red and his lips tremble. He stands up and makes his way over towards me. He slides off his shoes and cuddles up beside me on the bed. His arms snake themselves around my tiny waist, his head rests in the crook of my neck, his breath tickles my face, and his legs intwine with mine. It was odd. We fit. We both continue to cry; not really caring about if either of us saw our disgusting faces afterwards. I run my fingers through his soft tousled hair. I loved his hair. It was so soft. And his dimples made me dizzy. Dimples are my ultimate weakness. I love everything about them. Peter has them, Ariel had them, my mom has them, I have them...Austin has them.
