"Sweetie, you have to do it. Go get a selfie with that biker guy near the fountain." Murr reminds me as if I have already forgotten the task at hand.
"I know what to do, fuckhead." I snap. This biker guy was nearing probably around 6 feet, 5 inches, and he had muscles the size of tires.
"Excuse me sir," I tap the biker's shoulder politely trying to prevent my voice from cracking. "W-would you um... Would you maybe take a quick selfie with me?" I question while my knees shake involuntarily underneath me.
"Okay sure. I'll take a selfie with you," Oh thank the lord "If, you'll let me grab one of those knockers you got there." He finishes. Oh for fuck sake of course. I can hear Joe and Sal laughing obnoxiously loudly in my earpiece. I can't take the loss... but there will be absolutely NO 'knocker grabbing' or groping in the park. No fucking way.
"Oh haha no no sir... None of that just... A quick selfie! Painless!" I laugh nervously trying not to cry. This isn't going to end well.
Before I'm aware of it, the biker has me pinned flush up against his very large body with no room to breathe and no possible escape.
"You got a husband, Sugar tits?" He spits down at me. Okay that was uncalled for. Dick. His harsh tone causes me to scowl and turn my face away the best I possibly can. Okay guys this isn't funny anymore... Someone fucking do something!! I scream in my head but nothing comes out of my mouth as it's pressed to the biker guy's enormous torso. "Hey!" He whispers down at me pulling me out of my own mind. "I asked you a question, didn't I?" I swallow nervously and open my mouth slightly to answer when in interrupted by a familiar voice behind my back.
"Hey! Hey man paws off my girlfriend!" Oh thank the lord up above for creating Brian Quinn. Q's voice gets louder as he jogs closer to where the biker and I are standing. "Wanna tell me what the hell is going on here?" I would love to tell you but I'm still embedded in this man's abdomen!!
"This your girl??" The biker guy says with a tone of disgust in his voice.The smell of cigarettes and too much cologne have now most likely burned my nasal cavities permanently. I need to get away from him.
"Yeah she's mine. Why exactly are you holding her?" Q asks in a more intimidating version of his own voice.
"Bro she just threw herself at me like I was some chew toy. Starting rubbing on me and kissing me, this bitch is crazy bro she's fucking crazy! It's all I could do to keep her from undoing my pants. Fucking whore." The biker guy pushes me roughly at Q causing me to yelp loudly, drawing a few curious stares our way.
"Jesus, can you maybe keep it in your pants?" Q says to the biker guy. Except wait... Are you talking to me?? You are!! Oh I'm going to kill you, you bastard. Q looks at me with a disgusted look on his face. I open my mouth to tell him off but I'm interrupted.
"You should keep her on a leash or something." The biker guy tells Q, and they both laugh. I'm going to murder you Brian. I hope you can somehow hear this cause I'm gonna kill you.
"I've been told that by many people, man." At Q's words my jaw actually drops and my body is on fire, ready to fuck someone up. Preferably Brian Quinn. "See you man thanks again!" He says before dragging me roughly back to the other guys by the arm, still in 'character'. Neither of us speak.
As soon as we get back to the other guys and the camera crew, I shake myself free of Q's tight grip.
"Let go Brian, I'm fine." I give him a pissy stair before turning to Murray who is currently attempting to ask a million questions regarding my well-being. Joe and Sal have joined some of the crew and are now talking to the biker guy. His face will more than likely be blurred out. If they even use this footage. God I hope they don't. I do my best to concentrate on all of Murr's annoying questions but rudely interrupt him with a question of my own.
"Why did you guys send Brian out? I was doing perfectly fine, I was handling it." I whisper not knowing if Q was still behind us.
"Handling it? Honey, that guy had you pinned up against him with no way of escaping and he was enormous! We waited way longer than I wanted to." He whispers back at me with a slight hint of anger in his voice. I glare at him with gritted teeth before giving up and walking away to my bag near one of the cameras.
"Hey cupcake, that new boyfriend of yours, he's quite the guy. A modern day Romeo if you ask me!" I roll my eyes before turning around to face both Joe and Sal staring at me.
"Yes yes I know he's a dream come true." I smile lightly before pushing past them to get my phone in my bag. Before I can even unlock it I hear someone clearing their throat loudly in front of me.
"I'm sorry." Q states firmly as I look up at him properly. "That seemed like the best way to go about the situation without either of us getting hurt." That's a good point. It's okay Q I'm not that upset.
"Listen bitch," okay that came out worse than intended, "I did not need help back there I was okay, and you were really rude." I say not intending the whine in my voice.
"I know and I'm sorry. It was Murray who told me to go out there anyway, even though I wanted to, he wanted me to go almost as soon as that guy touched you." Q says matter-of-factly. "He just knew I would be more intimidating than he would." Q laughs to himself before apologizing again and walking away.
I look back down at my phone and bite my lip. Thanks Murray I really owe you one.
"Hey kid, want lunch?" Joe comes up behind me, making me jump. "Just you and me, yeah?" He smiles kindly.
"Yeah okay." Is smile back and grab my bag.
Side note: thank Murr next time you see him alone.
YOU ARE READING
The Fifth Joker
FanfictionI have known Brian, James, Sal, and Joey since freshmen year of high school, even though we went to separate schools of course. We had all been really close with a friendship that's really just unbreakable. So when they asked me to join Impractical...