My state of mind

"Why did you do it Michelle? Was it worth it? Look where your at now,"

"I..." I tried to answer my mother as I lay in the hospital bed barely awake. But for some reason I couldn't manage to say what I actually ment. " I....I didn't mean for this to happen."

" I don't think you can come home, I have given you so many chances yet you always show me that I shouldn't."

" mom I'm sorry I will change it wasn't my fault..." I tired to convince my mother.

" it's not your fault? Michelle you swallowed the pills on your own, and you,locked yourself in the bathroom," she yelled at me while giving me a glare so deep, I felt as if she could see into my soul.

" mom you have no idea. Maybe if you and dad could hold down a stage relationship together I wouldn't always feel so alone and broken." I yelled back.

" our relationship has nothing to do with your mental condition," she trailed off.

"You effect me more then you think"

My mother went over to the large window In my hospital room, like something actually interesting was going on out there.

" I don't need this. Or life. Or your help. I'm fine on my own, I don't need anyone's help!" My mom looked at me like she had never been more disgusted about me In her whole life.

Then she walked away, and I knew that, that would be the last time I would see her in a long time.