The Diary

Chapter 1 Me

Dear diary,                                                           1.1.2016
it's new year and a new chapter right? Huh I wished it was. You know what I think? New year, same me. So who am I in the new year? I'm Rose Redbird, 15 years old now living with my mom, still hating dad, having such self loved perfect sister and annoying brother. I'm still the oldest, always guilty and never good enough. Yep that's me.
New year goals: wear more black, try harder, be better dancer and beat sister.
I am wishing that everything will change. I can just hope.
And now I'm going to "help" my poor sister which got drunk af yesterday and is still pretending to be drunk. Which is so impossible. Idk how people can believe her.

Dear diary,                                                           2.1.2016
today was nothing special, I guess it was all that new year drama. Everypony is giving you hugs, hands, there is just too much touching people.
I saw him today again. I can't describe Ash he is blonde w/ blue eyes and warm smile. Okey so the thing is I love his as hell much. The things between us is we can't be together. We always fight. We've been together a lots of times in this 2 years but we always broke up. But I can't describe what we feel around each other. We're just like animals seriously we wanna tear each other off.
So what we did... We talked a lot cuddled a little. I almost kissed him. It was hard to resist. I had to resist because of my "boyfriend".
So Raven he is this guy from school, extremely handsome but the thing is I am the first girl he ever had/liked I guess and he doesn't know stuff. He is also policeman baby boy. This tells enough. I know my father is a policeman too but i am very rebel.
My love life is extremely complicated atm.
I don't want to care, I can't care. It would be too much for me and I don't want to go to my old ways.
It's late now see you tomorrow.
Night.

Dear diary,                                                       3.1.2016
IT IS SNOWING OUTSIDE, EVERYTHING IS WHITE!! I love snow sooo much, it is finally here. So I woke up very late today. I was so happy. With my mom we had lunch we ate fundi.
For those which don't know what fundi is: it is a ball usually filled with oil/cheese/chocolate (only one thing of course) and you have a big plate with food and you put it on the stick put it inside hot oil/cheese/chocolate and you "fry" it and have a lot of sauces around and its very yummy ! Maybe you don't understand what I mean but i'm very sorry. I am having no clue how to explain it better.
It's Sunday. Tomorrow it's school again. I don't wanna go huh. I was studying and watching Winx club. I am not childish I just love animated series and definitely series without animation.
In the evening I finally got to talk with my beast friend in the world. Her name is Nika. I can't tell you about her hair it is always different. Her eyes are so beautiful and her lashes are extreme. She is small and skinny af even tho she doesn't feel it. I adore her in many ways, with knowing she is psycho. She was in mental hospital for two times now but she is going to be fine. She has to be fine. I can't live without her. She is the reason I'm still here standing that strong. We are so alike it's getting creepy and know each other TOO much. It's great tho I wouldn't wish for anyone else. I have her and thats almost everything that counts.
Later my moms "boyfriend" came. I don't know what he is but I don't like him his energy is bad. He is a bad person but my momma is so in love after all heartbreaks.  He is staying the night. I can hear them giggling from the other room. I don't like it.
I better go to sleep.
Night