You cut. You burn. You turn but never truly learn.
You learn to hide and heal the cuts and burns but will always have a permanent reminder of when you showed that one moment of pain. To some, it's something to be proud of, to show you're hurting but you didn't give in. To others it's a curse, hiding your body. Hiding the shame. You don't want them to know so you think of new excuses, new ways to hide them.
Yet you know. You worry. You know someone knows why you cover up, why you lie. They see past the excuses and the lies, they see through it all. Exposed to them. They see everything but do nothing, say nothing. They let you carry on and that's exactly what you do. However, there'll be more. More who know about what you do and it scares you.
Some may think you're insane. Some may call you an attention seeker and then there's the others. The others who try to help you, to make you believe you're worth something and that you are loved. It's true, is it not? That someone, somewhere loves and cares about you. I believe it's true. I found those people. Those amazing people who make me believe that I am a better person than I first thought I was. Yes, I still have those days where I feel useless and that I don't belong but they're there.
They will always be there to bring me out of the dark hollowness from within. To them I am forever grateful and I hope that one day I can be one of those people who can make someone feel the way I did once brought out of the hollowness inside. I want to prove to them that they are loved and cared for no matter who they are or what they've done. We're all cared about by someone, even if it's just one person. We're still cared about.
