My Dream Journal

Drowning

*This dream is an old one, I had this when I was about 9 years old but for some reason always remembered it*

I feel small, I think i'm about 6 years old and the world looks fuzzy.

I look around me and see a bunch of relatives and 'friends' of the family all spreaded in areas of someones backyard. I know this isn't my house because there is a massive pool in the middle of the backyard and I dont have a pool at my house. 

The sky is a beautiful blue with the sun about to set, leaving the sky a nice orange glow. I just continue to stand there feeling alone and small with all these adults talking to eachother. To feel less like an outcast, i search for my parents to talk to and only see my mom. She is talking to other adults in which all of them are standing up making them look like towers. Intimidating. 

I start walking towards her.

"Mommy, Mommy...." I wait patiently for her to look back at me but she just continues talking to those people.

"Mommy. Hey mommy." I start to tug on her shirt a little bit, still getting no reaction. So then I just hug her waist, looking up, but she still doesnt look at me. I feel so alone, I just want her to look at me and talk to me like how shes talking with those people. I want her to laugh with me, smile at me. But she never once glances my way,

I walk back to the door leading outside to the backyard and notice a broom leaning against the wall. Suddenly, in one swift motion, i'm sitting on the broom (like how a witch does in one of those witch shows or like how old books would have it about witches).

I am literally floating from the ground on this broom, only a couple of feet off the ground. I feel so light and giddy, this is so amazing! I look around to see if anyone noticed this crazy scenario.

Like before, no one is even looking in my direction.

"Look! Hey, look at me, Im flying!" Their voices all power over my own. No one can even hear me, they all speak so loud. To get their atention, I decide to fly right over the pool.

I'm about 6 feet above the pool, not even worried that i might fall. I was flying and no way could something bad happen. I looked expectantly to my mom, and cheerifully shouted,"Mommy, look, I'm flying!" 

I continue to stare at her. All i wanted was a smile, at the least a smile, I just wanted her to see that I was here. But, deep down I knew she didn't care, she was too busy talking to her friends. They were more important.

My heart sunk, my throat felt tight and suddenly, with no warning, the broomstick flipped making me drop hard into the water.

I didnt even get a chance to try and stay on the surface. Once I fell I just started drowning automaticallly, flailing my arms in the pool and drinking all the water, looking up blearily for someone to try to save me. All i could see was the bright, blurry sky slowly getting dark and on the corner of my eye, people were still laughing and talking. And with all that, no one even noticed me...

My Reaction to dream once i woke up: *heaving* *hard-breathing* *sobbing* Holy shit....Its okay, it was just a dream... *breaths slower*  Ok, I m fine, now  back to sleep....*went back to sleep*