It was Grade 9. Session started in July, and all of us filed into our classrooms eagerly, new teachers, new timetables, the usual. But most importantly , for the newcomers. What would we get this year? Hot guys? Nerdy Guys? Stupid Wannabees?
There were about 6 or so newbies, 4 guys and 2 girls. We were introduced to them, and by far Ken Lester was the hottest , closely followed by Noel Walker . But somehow, it was Noel I found more ... attractive , somehow. Maybe looks aren't all that matter huh.
Honestly, I spent my first three months in the class thinking he was way out of my league and all of that. And we didn't talk much. Just maybe ask for a notebook or two, that's about it?
And then.
It all happened quite abruptly.
Suddenly one day I received a phone call from an unknown number, and it was him. God bless the kind soul who did give him my phone number though. Asking for an activity, even though I had been 100% sure he had been writing it down in school when Mr. Grant was dictating it. I told him. We talked for some 10ish minutes more, and then damnit, my phone battery died. Yay.
It seemed as though he was trying to find ways to talk to me.
But no, I then thought. Not possible. No chance.
I've always been that kind of girl who thinks she isn't important to anyone, and getting all this attention was kind of unusual for me. Whoever (guy) (except my best friend, Jem) talked to me , even if they tried hard, my totally reactionless attitude shooed them away.
But Noel... He kept on going, didn't retreat once, pushing me till he actually made me want to talk to him , and soon I craved for his attention, which I thankfully got. But it was new to me, and I couldn't make anything of it.
We started talking regularly in school, and even at home. Those were good times. He became my best friend, and....
I started falling madly in love with him.Before this phase, I hated the concept of love. I had stayed away and maintained a considerable distance from this monster , because I was afraid of it . Like a lot. I had witnessed far too many failed attempts at successful relationships, and face it, it created more problems. But this time, withdrawing wasn't working. I just couldn't.
Anyway, the insecure shadow at the back of my mind told me its impossible. And so I satisfied myself with his friendship.
Until that night , in November, when he suddenly texted me that he needed to see me as soon as possible, and told me to meet him in my yard.
I snuck out of the house and there he was, in sweats and pyjamas. Not to mention bedraggled hair. WHICH JUST MADE HIM LOOK MORE DASHING.
He had a copy of a book of my favorite series, the Mortal Instruments.
And then he spoke-
"Mel, I need to talk to you. I've been trying to tell you for days, but i couldn't bring myself to do it. Today I convinced myself to do it, and before I could convince myself back out of it, I came. I know what you feel. To love is to destroy, and to be loved is to be the one destroyed. But what I want to say is it is worth it to be destroyed if I get to be with you. I want to be destroyed, if you're the one who's going to be the destroyer. I love you Mel, I love you like I've never loved anyone else so much, and I just had to tell you that. I'm sorry I couldn't do it in a more romantic way-"
"More romantic way? Are you kidding me? My favourite line from my favorite novel? "
He smiled. And that smile made me feel like I was falling through the air, into some never ending pit in the dark.
"Then... Will you go out with me?"
There.
Despite so many proposals before, I hadn't ever surrendered. But this guy seemed worth all the trouble..
He bent on his knees and handed me the copy of The Mortal Instruments: City Of Heavenly Fire. A note was taped onto the cover " Can I get to be Jace with you as my Clary? "
I melted then and there. I WAS HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE.
What was my answer? As if you don't know that already xD
"Yes, Noel. I will" , I practically screamed. (No one else was home, otherwise I wouldn't have dared to )
For a year and a half, it was just amazing. He was the best boyfriend ever, and made me feel special. Simply special.He's got that way of letting you know that he's yours. And no matter how many girls constantly hit on him, it was useless. He always made time for me, even though he literally had the whole school's weight on his shoulders. The soccer team, The Art Department, and what-not. Never before had I loved someone like this. He was my first, and he completely changed me and my life. And THAT is an understatement. When I was with him , nothing else really mattered. Yeah , sounds typical cliché , but it's true.
And I felt good, something I hadn't exactly felt completely in my entire life till then. So I went with him.
And then... I received this pathetic piece of news, and I knew I couldn't afford breaking down and dragging him down with me, and I ended it.
26th of June, I did it. We sat hand in hand, my head buried in his lap, and he was trying to soothe my breathless sobs. He was all up for a long - distance relationship, but let's get real, there was no point. I knew that it just wasn't possible. No matter how many promises you make , it just doesn't end up that way. That's just what happens with friends also , isn't it? You talk and be serious and all for a good couple of days and all, and then bam- it's as if suddenly you never knew each other. And I definitely did not want things getting messy and ending that way between us.
The only comfort was, I knew.
I knew that he still loved me, and I still had somebody who valued me so much. And at least it wasn't one those love-turned- hate breakups, so it was okay.
But now I felt like everything was going to crumble to ashes, and life wasn't worth living anymore.
Little did I know, that my life was going to be turned upside down...
