Donners of the Dead

CHAPTER 10

At first I wasn't quite sure how it happened. When I opened my eyes in the grey light of dawn, I found myself inches from Jake's chest. I sucked in my breath and slowly raised my head to see him peering down at me through his long lashes.

"Morning," he whispered gruffly as he watched my eyes widen, a trace of a smile on his lips.

What the dickens was I doing, lying next to him like this?

Then it all came back to me. Visions of sleep and snow and the grainy reality of dreams.

A nightmare.

In it, I had been walking through the woods hand in hand with my father, snow falling softly around us. Unlike my other dreams, I wasn't a younger girl but as old as I was now, and we were in these very mountains, not the safe world he'd been a part of. My father was ageless, with kind eyes that twinkled in the fading blue light. The world around us was silent and he kept repeating a word over and over again. I had no idea what it meant, until finally he stopped and held me close to him.

"It means strength, Evangeline," he said softly. "You must draw strength from fear or fear will make you weak."

"I don't need strength," I whispered back to him, holding onto his hand. "I have you."

He pulled away and looked me up and down, his eyes flitting through a range of different colors—brown to hazel to red to grey. "There is no me. There are only monsters inside of angels and angels inside of monsters. Choose wisely."

He stepped away from me and his face contorted with pain.

"Papa," I cried out as his skin turned ashen and pale, his eyes glowing blue. A horrible, beautiful blue. I reached for him but immediately took my hand back when the smell of rotting meat took over.

He grinned at me like a savage wolf. "Which one am I?" he asked in a snarling voice, his words dripping with an animalistic quality, steaming saliva that came from his mouth and hit the snow with a hiss.

He was a monster inside of an angel.

I turned and ran, and like in all dreams, I ran fast enough to fly, and then slow, like I was slogging through oatmeal. Suddenly the cabin appeared in the woods, the hanging lamp by the door wide open and waiting.

I ran into the cabin, still smelling the monster that was my father, knowing he was right on my trail.

I yelled for help from Jake and Tim and stopped dead when I saw Avery lying motionless on the table. I ran for him, trying to speak his name, but the words wouldn't come and his eyes wouldn't open.

Then the door behind me slammed shut. Everything went black.

Except for two blue glowing eyes, right where Avery should have been.

Claws dug into my back, ripping me apart like my spine was a seam.

I woke up with a start, covered in sweat and breathing hard. My back ached as if the claws had been real. I couldn't figure out if I'd been screaming or not, but Tim was sitting by the door, asleep with his head against it. I remembered getting up and looking at Jake as he lay there, deep in sleep. Fear was motivating me and this was how I was drawing strength from it. I lay down beside him, feeling more afraid than proud, and promptly fell asleep.

Now that it was morning and I was right up against him, the fear was gone and the embarrassment came flooding in. I had behaved like a little girl who had a bad dream.

"I'm sorry," I whispered quickly. I knew my face was growing red despite the chill in the air.

As I made the move to get up he said, "No." He licked his lips. "Stay. It's still early."