had u given me a second chance...

had u looked back one last time,

had u seen me and all my loneliness,

had u not left me groping there in the dark...

had u not left me crying to myself...

had u not left me without you...

I would not be the broken person I am today

if only you'd given me a second chance!

did it hurt you to see me cry?

did you enjoy me begging you to stay...

with fat tears running down my 5 year old cheeks?

when I held you tight mother

did it ever affect you or ...

you felt indifferent like you always did?

remember all those times I showed you my untidy, bright drawings?

all I ever wanted was your acceptance, your affection

all I ever wanted was for you to hold me close and tell me you loved me...

but you always told me that now's not the time...

was it so hard for you to acknowledge your own blood just once?

I told myself all these years growing up...

you wanted a better life for me, a better future?

I kept consoling myself saying the same things over and over again,

but then I became sick of this facade and I became sick of your little game,

I decided to come behind you and finish this game once and for all....

if you'd only given me a second chance!

now I'm holding a trigger to your head,

you're begging me to not pull it,

I'm asking you why and you tell me in your hypocritical way,

"I love you "

so long I've waited to hear this from your mouth

but today they don't mean a thing...

you're begging me to stay, telling me you love me

you're clutching me tight with tears running down your face...

but today I walk away...

I pull the trigger watch you fall lifelessly next to my feet

I don't feel any remorse .

if only you'd given me a second chance....