Pain and Love

The beginning of the end

She was perfect. I can't say why she kept coming back, but it was love. You don't find love everyday, I couldn't give up. No matter how much I needed to. For her sake.

     We met at the park. I was sitting where I usually do, writing a new article for the times, when she walked past me. But when she saw me she didn't look away. She ran right into a pole, dropping all of her papers and books. I ran over to help her up, but she was already up and picking up her papers. I picked up a few of the scattered papers and noticed what they were about. The title of one of them was, "How to Find a Boyfriend." I wanted to laugh so badly, the gorgeous girl in front of me had books on getting a boyfriend. She noticed me staring at the book and quickly took it from me, blushing. 

     "You don't need these books," I said.

     "How? I lost my mind, and dumped my last perfect boyfriend. The next thing I know I have another one. But he . . . He's not the same.

     "How is he different?"

     "He just is, I don't wanna talk about it." When she wiped her tears I could see a black bruise around her eye.

     "He hurt you, didn't he?" 

     "How'd you know?" She said looking down. 

     "Your makeup rubbed off. Your bruise is showing."

     "Oh." There was a long pause when she finally talked again. "Who are you?" Her voice was tense and quiet.

     "I'm jay. I work at the times writing articles. What is your name?" 

     "She considered me for a second, then answered, "I'm Jesse. I'm a student at Texas State. I work at my family's small restaurant."

     "Would you like to talk sometime?" I asked cautiously. Please say yes.

     "I'm busy right now, but maybe tomorrow? I know a good coffee shop.

     "Yah, sure. Do you need a ride to the library?" Jesse looked confused. "You won't need those books for long. Your to beautiful and smart to have those.

     "Ummm . . . Are you headed that way. Her head was down again and she spoke quietly. I lifted her chin and motioned toward my car, which I had parked in front of my writing table. She climbed in the passenger seat with her books and papers while I held the door. Then I climbed in and drove off.

One year later- 

I couldn't say why I had hit her. I was just mad, I didn't mean to. I tried to restrain myself this time but my anger took over. She had come home late one night. I grew suspicious, too suspicious. Then suspicion turned to anger. And the next thing I knew, she was crying on the floor, holding her eye. The same eye that I saw when I first met her. I didn't feel anything until I forced my self to stop yelling. Then I realized what I had done.

     "I'm sorry, I really am. I just got mad and I wasn't thinking. Let me see your eye." I stepped toward her and she backed away, farther into the corner. I ran my hands through my hair, thinking about how bad her eye was. Then how bad I'd probably made it. "I won't hurt you. Please, let me help you." She looked up and removed her hand from her eye. Her pupil had turned a dark red, and the skin around her eye was swollen and bloody. What had I done. When she cried harder, my anger rose. Can't she just shut up? I couldn't focus which got me madder. And I layer hand on her again.

Jesse-

     He had hurt me before, but it didn't hurt as much as this time. I had come back to him every time. Why? Because I was alone and afraid of anyone else hurting me. At least I was used to the pain in my eye when he hit me. 

     I had come home late when he asked me where I had been. I just said I had to stay late during work. I didn't lie, but he thought I did. He raised his voice. Then he screamed, I had years running down my face already. I was used to the pain, but that didn't mean I wasn't hurt. He had lied before, and was going to lie after he hit me now. He would say he wouldnt hit me ever again, even though we both knew it was a lie. He grabbed my wrist when I backed away, and grabbed my hair. I could feel his breath on me as he yelled. My ears rang, and my head hurt. I closed my eyes like I always do, and winced at the pain of the punch to my eye. His words were venom and my tears were acid. He let me go, and I cried at the pain in my head and in my eye. I could see the anger in him rising again.

     "Stop crying! I let go of you and you cry louder!? I'll give you something to really cry about! You want that?! Huh?!" His words were poison in my heart. Then he grabbed my hair again pulling me off my feet into the air. I screamed grabbing at my hair. 

     "Please! Stop! Owwww! Nooooo!" I cried. He let me down but still held my hair, dragging me to the dining table. He took out rope from the drawer, and tied my hands to the table leg. I ducked my head while he whipped my with his belt.

One day later

I woke up sore from being abused. Jay was still asleep. I needed to find the courage to tell someone. This time he went too far. I snuck next to him and reached into his pocket where he had the car key. When I finally got it I ran outside, got in the car, and drove away. I had to drive twenty miles to the nearest police station. Then I saw him in his friends truck, following right behind me. I took my phone out to dial 911. The phone rang, and rang, while Jay rammed the back of the car with his truck. When the police answered I told them the whole story. How he had been abusing me, and how he hurt me. I told them he was behind me right now ramming into me. I have them my location. And about 5 minutes later I saw the police ahead of me. I pulled over holding on to the steering wheel for when Jay rammed into me again. I finally got out of the car and ran, Jay still following me on foot. But I wasn't fast enough. That was the last thing I remembered. But when I woke up I couldn't see, it was all black. I felt my face and found a bandage wrapped around my eyes. I was scared, afraid of the reality of blindness. I couldn't be blind, please don't let me be blind. There was the beeping of a moniter to my left and to my right I could here my best friend talking. Praying. 

     "Mira? Is that you?" I asked. 

     "Oh my god! Your alive! Thank god. The doctors said might not make it. They told me that Jay had blinded you and broke your arm and ankle. I was so worried!" 

     I smelled her vanilla hand lotion, and felt her hand around mine. "I tried to run, I called the police. But when I saw them I got out of my car and ran towards them. They were to late though. He caught up to me." I  spoke softly. But my voice got choked up. 

     "But your here now. Your ok! You left him, you got him put in jail. He can't hurt you anymore. You did it." She was right, but I was hurt, blind, scarred.