Never Leaving |Climbing Class|

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It's not like he wasn't unattractive anymore more, from his right side he was still great looking. High bone structure and nice eyes even with the bags under them, it was the other side that was the real issue. A huge scar and a few sharp and always exposed teeth that served as a forever reminder of what he had done.

Even if he had been reassured many times he was forgiven he still catches all of them glancing at him every now and again, still sees a quick flash of fear, anger, or shame when they look at him before they quickly hide it. He wasn't worth it, he was hideous inside and out and he was just dragging them back to that night. He can't take it anymore. He needs to tell Chris they are ov-

A knock at the bathroom door makes him jump. He always jumps anymore, he never use to jump. They all do now. Expect Mike, he doesn't react to anything anymore. He's cold, distant like he's always ready for anything. He probably is now. Mike has always wanted to go college, he had a full ride with a football degree although he really wanted to go further his education. He wanted to open a sports shop. Now he's leaving for the military training in a few months. Jess was crushed, not like she'd tell anymore. Jess doesn't seem to seem to talk much except with Mike. She's the only one that can get him to seem alive. Everyone changed that night.

Ashley hates him. She doesn't say it but he can tell. She thinks he tricked Chris into whatever they are. He wishes that was true, it would make it easier to do what he has to.

"Josh?"

Josh took a deep sigh, "I'll be right out. I'm not feeling good can we skip tonight?"

There was a moment of silence, "Open up. Come on," Josh looked at himself one more time in the mirror before putting on his medical mask and opens the door, "What's up with the mask? You haven't worn that in a year?"

Josh looked down at the floor and closed his eyes. "Chris, I think we should...we shouldn't be together?"

"Excuse me?"

Josh felt tears rise in his eyes. He refused to look at Chris, he knows if he does he won't be able to get the words out, "Chris, I'm a monster. I don't want to be with you anymore. You aren't good or me, we aren't good for each other. I hate this and it can't keep going on. You deserve someone human, not me," Josh waited for Chris to do something. Say something, tell him he was wrong. Tell him they weren't over. Hell, just grab his mask off and kiss him. He wasn't prepared for silence. When he finally looked up, he swore his heart broke. Chris was just staring at him, hand over his mouth, tears streaming silently down his face.

"Josh, there will never be someone else for me but if you need to leave me. I understand."

Josh didn't leave. He never would.

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