(Were)wolves Do Not Purr

A minirant, by Getsuga88

So, ploughing through the chaff that is the first few pages of every topic's 'what's hot' list, I come across a somewhat interesting title (which I don't remember the name of). I won't go into much detail about it, because it's not my intent to hurt people's feelings.

This story, written in first person, starts out well enough. The author seems to have trouble discerning you're from your and they're/their from there... and where from were/we're... and our from are - but that's not the point, I continued reading through the first chapter with the occasional painful scrunch up of my face.

On the second page of the second chapter, after an infodump of a first chapter and more explaining on the first page of that second chapter, the leading character encounters (blows the trumpet) HER MATE, hurray! And, since this leading character has a multiple personality disorder and her wolf is a different persona in her head, she gets told this by said wolf.

Freakishly big man of a mate defies the laws of physics (and personal space) and suddenly stands before the leading character. Her wolf is going crazy in a hedonistic ritualistic dance inside her head and encouraging the leading character to do the same, because this unknown person is good-looking, enormous and (more trumpets) an ALPHA, yes, her ALPHA MATE, how original.

Alright, alright, I'm straying from the main topic. Rewind just a little bit to where the wolf was doing the limbo, the tango and the chachacha. You're with me? Good. Wolf persona was not only dancing and dry humping the unknown guy, no, wolf persona was purring.

Purring.

If you have a dog, or know about dogs... or have a brain with an ounce of smarts to it, you'd know that wolves and in extention werewolves (including the human part of them), do NOT purr. Does a dog purr? No, it doesn't. Why not? Because it can't. Now, a dog may rumble when it is contented, but the repetitive purring noise is only made by felines. So don't go calling a rumble a purr, because a purr is only made by cats. (I've been around enough canines and felines to know)

Actually, if I think about it. Writing a (shifter/were)wolf story always results in nonsensical, awkward situations. There are few authors who can pull it off without it sounding  corny, but the wolf as a talking/sentient part of someone is just stupid. Where in the fabrication of a shifter did the animal gain human intelligene to form words and explain things the human in turn does not know? Why place two separate entities in one body?

The werewolf genre on wattpad frustrates me. Because people copy off eachother and think they're using 'facts' to create their characters. I simply stumbled over the word 'purring' one too many time and had to post this mini rant.

Might make something more out of this. Spilling my guts when something else works on my nerves ;).