Disappear

Home

I awoke to an exceptionally clean room. Bright light filtered in through the window beside me, on my right. I looked to my left to see Levi seated beside me. His gray eyes looked straight into my own, and his features softened. "How do you feel?" He asked. "I'm good." I gave my typical answer. I would not inform him of my pain on the inside, so I only considered the physical idea of my feelings, and spoke nothing of mental stability. "What happened to Jean" I asked. His face contorted into a smirk as he said "He's fine. Just hospitalized at the moment  due to a fractured skull. Nothing seriously damaged though." He said. My thoughts wandered to the idea that it was my fault Jean was hurt. If I hadn't shown up for the beating, Levi wouldn't of come, and Jean would've been fine. I hurt Jean. It's my fault. Nothing but self blame stormed through my head, a stampede, killing hope. Crushing. Suffocating. I kept my face straight. "Oh.." I fiddled with the sheets of the hospital bed. "When am I going to be released?" I questioned. "They said you can leave tomorrow. Do you have anyone to pick you up?" He asked. My family never picked me up from anywhere. In fact I never really saw my family. My sister moved out with her drugged up friends, my mom always always at work. The only thing that woman loved was her job, and as for my dad, well he was wasted, and destructive. Also he was never really home. I used to have a dog, Duke. Although we had to give him up when dad made a bet, and lost a lot of money. Nothing was there for me at that place called "home". It was empty. Nobody cared if I came back or not. "Yes" I said. 'I can just walk' I thought. " he looked at me with a piercing gaze "I'll drive you. I know you're lying, so don't try to convince me otherwise." He said. My home was not a place of safety. It wasn't a "home". It was broken, and terrifying. I nodded my head, understanding there would be no way to change his mind. " Ok then I'll let you rest up." Levi said as he stood. He brushed himself off and walked out the doorway. His frame left my vision, and I knew I was about to break. Jeans hurt. It's my fault. I got out of the bed, and started searching for something sharp. A scalpel laid upon the counter in the corner of the room. I shuffled along the white, clean tiles. I picked up the blade, and continued thinking those thoughts of guilt.
I pressed the cold blade along my (your skin color) skin. A subtle pain stinging my skin, and blood lightly trickling along my arm. I deserved that pain is what I thought. The soft breaking of skin, that addicting stinging feeling. The anxiety of going "home". The anxiety of school. Bullying. Words. Pain. All of those things created my masterpiece of cuts upon my forearm. I wanted to break. I wanted to die. I wanted the pain. "Home". "Home"....
I finished the attack on my arm, and headed for the bathroom. The sickeningly lemon-clean scent filling my nose as I entered the small room. I looked in the mirror, and noticed the tears staining my skin. I washed my arm carefully as to not damage it any further. Once the blood was washed away, I went back to my bed. What time was it? I unlocked my phone, and checked. 8:56. I decided I would try to sleep. I closed my eyes. Pictures of "home" filling my sight. I pushed away the thoughts of "home", and fell to sleep.
I heard the soft calling of my name. "(Y/N). Come on, wake up. It's one o'clock." I jolted up once I heard the time. My head colliding with someone else's. My hand found my forehead, and i rubbed my temples. "Levi?" I asked. "Shit. Yeah, it's me. I'm here to take you home." My eyes widened. "Oh.. Ok" I hopped out of bed, and walked over to the bathroom. My Attack on Titan pajama bottoms making a swishing sound beneath me. Quickly, I changed into black skinny jeans, and a P!ATD T-shirt. Then I headed out the door to meet up with Levi. I signed out of the hospital, and we walked through the medium sized parking lot. Black streaks, and cracks covered the road. Levi walked over to a black Impala.
"Are you rich, and you're just not telling me because I know for a fact that Impalas are not cheap, and I swear if you say you're not rich,I'm letting you know right now I'm gonna assume you're dealing drugs or something." I joked. Levi rolled his eyes and got in the car. I followed his lead, and also got in.
"Your car is way too clean. Not even a pen lying in the backseat? Really?" I stated. It was absolutely spotless in his car. I know some people love their cars but this was too much.
"Bitch." Levi scoffed.
"Jerk." I replied
We finally arrived at my house, and I pushed the door open to get out of the car. "Thank you Levi. I really appreciate it." I said. "No problem at all." He waved his hand as goodbye. "Bye Levi. See yo-" I was cut off by a loud yelling coming from my porch.
"Where the hell were you?! You disgusting child!" I flinched a little. "-Tomorrow." I finished my sentence to Levi and closed his car door.
"Who was that!? Your booooyfriiend~? Hah! You disgusting slut. How pathetic are you? I really should've kill-" he cruelly remarked.
"Oi! Shut the hell up you drunken and irresponsible shit! Back the fuck off!" Levi was standing outside of the car, his demeanor was menacing, and all around demonic.
"Get in the car." He demanded. I had no problems in doing so, as I dove back into the Impala. Levi also got in, and buckled himself. My drunken father wobbled across the yard towards the car. "Hold on." Levi stated as he pushed his foot on the gas.
He sped off, and out of the neighborhood onto the main road. "Why didn't you tell me about your shit of a father? I wouldn't of minded you coming to my place if you'd had told me about your situation." He asked. "I didn't want to bother you. You've done too much for someone like me already." I answered. "What the hell do you mean by "someone like you"? If you mean a amazing, interesting, and intelligent person. Then yeah you're that kind of someone. Also in no way would I be bothered by you staying with me."
He replied. "Staying?" I questioned. "You are not going back, or anywhere near that shit-hole again." He answered.
"From now on your home is with me, and not with those people."
"Home... Yeah.. I like that." I smiled, and looked out the window.