I knew he was different the day i saw him. It was the first day of the 2nd semester of 8th grade in California.The was he laughed made me feel warm and welcomed and the way he talked made me fall for him more. But I was pretty sure he never even reconized me...I was in his gym class, and he was always around a crowd of people unlike me... I'm only around a few friends that are close to me.
And before I knew it I was always staring at him who sat in the other side of our row.I could never see the whole him.It was either staring at his face or his body but i always chose to look at his face.His name was Jack.He had a really kind face that i really got used to looking at which soon i had to leave. I always ended up searching for him in class and
sometimes I would be really upset if I didn't see him that day. I really was hoping he didn't
realize I really liked him..Mostly because I always thought he was too good for me and
becuase i was embarrassed that i had a one sided love that would never work out for me.
Once I told my bestest friend about my crush she kept on teasing me, but also wished e
good luck. I HONESTLY dont know why because I told her its never going to happen.
"Wow its already the 2nd last week of school..." I think to myself "I wonder what we're going
to do in P.E today..." and all we we're doing was playing weird games the teachers could
think of. And all of a sudden 4 kids came out and starting talking about really cheesy jokes.
I thought it was pretty cute so i told my friend "Hey i really like cheesy jokes dont you think
they're really cute?" and she said "yep, hahaha". I look around obviously looking for Jack as
I ask my friend this question and i notice him staring at me... Maybe he thinks I'm lame...Even though i was just thinking this it made me really sad.
My friend starting telling me how she saw Jack staring at me the other day which i obviously thought was a lie. And when she told me she wasn't i said "maybe he was staring at me because I look so ugly it looks funny.." everyone tells me I'm too mean to myself but I can't help it... Im not confident in myself at all... I always wished i was prettier or at least skinnier... I mean why would Jack even look at me?... There are so many prettier and skinnier girls in our class...
It was finally the last week of school.. I felt happy and quite sad at the same time... But i
never wanted to show the sad and negative side of myself at school... The only reason i
have friends is because I'm different like how my friends are different than the other people
at school... I'm so glad I met them.. But no matter how hard i try i can't try to be happy...Today i saw this girl sitting next to Jack staring at him and talking and laughing
together... They do look nice together.. I hope they work out... "RING" it finally lunch time...
my row gets dissmissed first and since we're on the bleachers Jack leaves last. I was
eating my lunch when i see Jack walk by and helplessly watch him getting further and
further away from me. Even though he is physically distancing himself from me without knowing it feels like he is also distancing away from my heart so he is unreachable... I cry myself to sleep this day..
