Letters from Julia

Chapter 2: Waylon Karam

Things have always been the same since I've lived in my city. Even for how large Lexington was (compared to the others cities in Kentucky,) everyone knew everyone. Maybe that was why I was so excited to leave and find my own place.

I've never saw myself living in the same place all of my life. I wanted to explore and see the world. I've always believed that you can learn a whole lot more if you actually experienced it.

That is why, I plan on attending the Art Institute of Chicago, in which I'll be majoring in drawing. I know I am talented at what I do, but I also know I am far from the best. This school had one of the best art programs in the country and I knew I could learn a lot from it.

My parents, however, weren't exactly keen on the idea when I first told them. That was because only a few weeks before that my girlfriend, Julia, killed herself. I think they thought I wanted to die too, and so they were afraid putting distance between us would increase the possibility.

Let me be clear, I would never kill myself. When I saw Julia's cold lifeless body during the funeral, I couldn't make myself do it. Maybe it was selfish of me to keep living when I promised we would always be together forever no matter what. But I just couldn't do it. I thought I was weak at first. Because, doesn't it show great bravery to take that step knowing you will die? That's what I thought, and at first I wanted to join her in death.

Soon after she died, I was in a bad place. I did things I shouldn't have. I was depressed so I took drugs to escape reality. I got drunk to numb the pain. I laid in bed because I had no purpose. Nothing solved the problem. That's why my parents made me go to a therapist. I hated going there, but I do know it was the best thing that I ever did. I got better quickly and soon after I used my artistic skills as a substitute of drugs and alcohol.

I've always liked to draw. It was something I found relaxing and fun at the same time. Drawing whatever is in your mind allows you to only focus on that one thing. You forget about the outside noises and the constant problems of your real life. It was why I loved it. I drew basically everything and anything. I didn't have a specific type like portraits or silhouettes. I just drew what I felt like. Sometimes it was of the sky when I saw something different than the plain old things like the sunset and/or sunrise. I liked unique. Things that made you look deeper into the picture itself so you could see what actually made it so special.

Now, as I look at my empty room, I realize why this room will always be so special to me. It was where I had so many firsts- from the first time I got into trouble to the first time I showed a girl my room.

I loved my grey painted room. Although most people would say it was boring, I'd disagree. Yeah, at first sight you wouldn't see anything special about it. But if you looked really closely, there was a mini fridge that blended into the side of my room. It wasn't obvious because the spot used to be a small storage area in which the opening was less than half the size of a regular door. Because the fridge fit exactly into the spot and was about the same hue as the wall, it blended in really well.

My fish tank was hidden too. Behind fake blinds on the other side of the room, my aquarium was inside a wall that separated my room from the hallway. Out in the hallway, people could see the aquarium, but no one realized that you could see it from my room too.

Behind a small picture frame of my mother and me, an 8 x 10 safe was hidden inside my wall. It was where I kept my money and things I didn't want people to see. It was large enough for me to fit a small electronic device in- if I wanted to.

Besides that, it only had the basics. A nightstand, dresser, and a bed. I didn't do decorations. I guess you could say I don't have any "favorites." I didn't have a particular band/ singer I liked, nor did I have a song that I loved more than the others. I wasn't into trains, airplanes, cars, and stuff that most guys like. I didn't care much about movies. I honestly wouldn't care if I was watching an action movie to a chick flick.