Okay so here's the deal: I'm gonna re-write some fairy tails and nursery rhymes. Oh but I can assure you, its gonna be like your reading a bunch of new stories! They won't be the same now that I've got a hold of them!
Oh and I don't own any of the original stories! I don't know who or if anybody still owns them directly, but I figure I should still say this. Well I guess type.
BEWARE: This book may be sad, some stories may have sad endings, so if you really don't like the suspense, you probably don't want to read this assortment of mixed tails. It may also seem offensive to some of the characters, but in a funny way. I will try my best to make you rotfl.
OKAY HAVE FUN!!!
First Tail: HE ONLY LOOKS WITH HIS EYES ( Twist on Sleeping Beauty)
Once upon a time, there lived a witch who loved to mix up potions and cause mischief. She was very content with the life she lead.
"Oh what fun it is to be a witch!" she would say. "no worries, no cares, why I can do whatever I please!"
That's where she was wrong. Soon enough, her cover as a maid was blown and she was banished from the kingdom.
Soon after that the King and Queen had a baby girl. They named her Abbie. Abbie was a beauty, long blond hair, big blue eyes, an angelic smile, and a great personality to boot! But she didn't have those things because she was a princess, oh no no no. She had those things because of the witch. The one who we talked about earlier in the story. Now the witch had put up a new disguise as the princess's personal slave. The witch knew the princess was really ugly, and being so spoiled her personality would be bratty! So knowing this, the witch cast a spell on the princess, to make her beatiful and kind, but the spell would only remain if the witch was alive. The witch knew that she would live forever as long as she wasn't killed with a silver knife. To bad for the princess that the witch was given a death sentence for killing the head chef. And the guillotine just had to be made of silver. What luck.
Well soon enough the spell on the princess wore off more and more each day. The king and queen tried to hush it up, but it didn't work so well.
Everyone in the kingdom found out about the royal secret! Their was nothing they could do for the politely mannered princess now. So they banished her to the murky woods of murk, with nothing but the clothes on her back (not literally she had clothes on her front too)
A few days later; the princess was starving, she didn't think she could live any longer! So she blacked out! What else could she do? Die in pain as the hunger nowed at her stomach? That was unlikely. She was a princess, how could the treat her like this?
After about 10 days and 10 nights later, the king of another kindom found the not so fair maiden.
"she must be a princess with the clothes on her!" the king said.
The king went and got his son, after hearing the fairy tales he thought his son could wake her up with a kiss!
"Aww I have to kiss her?! " the son cried with a disgusted look on his face.
"Yes." the king said bluntly.
The prince cringed and leaned down for a kiss. Too bad for him, the princess opened her dry blue eyes and slapped the prince.
"Owew!" the prince was in agony, that girl hit hard. "What was that for!?"
The princess stood up, not daring to answer his question. "Take me away kind king!"
So the king shrugged and helped her onto his horse, and off they went
On the horse ride:
"So, princess, who are your parents?" the king asked.
