The Funky Poop

Hugh Jass p.o.v.

I was sitting on the toilet one afternoon experiencing excruciating pain, when I heard a funky noise.

"What the hell is this?", I heard.

I looked between my legs and saw two chunky potatoes. I stared.

"Did I hear something? Ow that freaking hurt! I felt like I was giving birth.", I told myself.

I heard the noise again. "Oh, you did give birth papa.", it said.

I looked back into the toilet. There was something funky about my poop. It rolled over and there were... eyes? I screamed and flushed the toilet. My mom yelled,"What the hell is wrong with you? Get out of the bathroom."

I forgot to wipe, but I didn't turn back around either. I simply went to the living room and sat down.

"Heavens sake, Hugh! You are late for school.", my dad yelled. I left for school and the rest of the day was normal.