Life with Him

I wake with a start. Bad dreams again. Dreams of Abnegation murders and Dauntless troops. Of bullets going everywhere, smacking chunks of building off, and spraying the ground below. Dreams of my parents' deaths. And, worst of all, dreams of my brother's betrayal.

I haven't seen him heard from him, or even talked to him since I found out he was helping the former Erudite representative examine and play with my brain. I don't even know if he is still alive. His trial is after mine and i don't intend to stay and watch it.

I lean over and see Tobias sitting on the cold, tile floor with me. He leans over and kisses me. He smells like sweat and rust.

"Bad dream?" He asks.

"I've had better. How long was I asleep?"

"Maybe four hours."

"The Factionless still have all the guns?"

"Yes." He says and I notice a dark bruise on his jaw.

"What happened there?"

"After Lynn-umm-left, Uriah went over and cornered the doctor who couldn't do anything for her and started punching and kicking the life out of him,even tried to shoot him."

"Well, why didn't he?"

"I pulled him off of him. Figured we might need a medic sometime."

"Where is he now?"

Just as he is about to respond I hear a name call out 'Tris Prior, Dauntless'. Knowing that I'm about to be sent to prison or executed I want to say a goodbye to him. We give each other a quick kiss and he says,"Tris, I love you no matter what. I will always love you."

I throw my arms around his neck and the tears I have been trying so desperately to hold back spill over.

"As I love you. No matter what." I tell him.

I take a moment to collect myself and walk with my chin up into the trial room.

I walk in and see Tori, Harrison, and Evelyn all sitting at an Erudite lab table.

"Tris Prior. Five foot, three inches. One hundred thirteen pounds. Eye color, green. Hair color, blond. Original faction, Abnegation. Current faction, Dauntless. Confirmed Divergent." A monotone voice rattles off a list of my personal traits.

"Didn't expect to see you here." I look to the right and see Evelyn.

"Why wouldn't she be? She is, after all, a traitor." Says Tori.

"Let's not be so hasty. Let the girl plead her case."

There's that word I hate again. Girl.

"State your crimes."

"Well you see, I robbed a bank, kicked a puppy, and stole a car. Oh, and also, I'm a drug dealer."

"Enough games, Beatrice. Let us deal with the matter at hand. State your crimes."

"I have an idea. Why don't you state them."

"Alright. You are being held accountable for breaking and entering enemy territory, with yet, another enemy, betrayal, and failure to do as told."

"Are you done?"

"Beatrice, I am being very polite and patient with you and it would be a good idea if you didn't push my buttons."

"I just don't see what I did wrong. We deserved to know what was outside the fence and we got it. What's the big deal?"

"The big deal is that now that you have release that footage everybody will want to go outside the fence. What if we aren't ready? What if it wasn't our planned time to leave?"

The way she talks about our group of people makes me sick. Like we are their pawns. Like they control whatever we do.

"So, panel, what do we think?"

"I'm sorry Tris. Guilty." Says Harrison.

"Same from me. Except I'm not sorry." Comes from Tori. I want to hate her but I just don't seem to be able to.

"Well, I'm going to use my judges override on this one. Innocent. Tris you may leave the premises after I have a word with you in the hall.

I am overwhelmed. I can leave? What? Why would she ever let me stay? She hates me. Right?

I walk into the hallway, feeling cold.

"If you think this is because I like you, you couldn't be more wrong. I love my son. If anything happened to my son it would kill me. If you were to be executed or sent to prison he might just try to kill himself. And I can't deal with that."

"It certainly didn't kill you to leave him for most of his life. I mean, what mother does that to her child."

"What mother lets her child leave her safe faction and then, ultimately gets herself killed and leaves her daughter alone in the world?"

"Don't you dare talk about my mother like that." I spat at her. I whirled myself around and shoved the door open. I took off running in the opposite direction. I ran all the way to the Abnegation sector and stopped in front of my house. I turned the doorknob and it was unlocked. Of course it was unlocked, what Abnegation would break into someone else's house? I ran inside and threw myself onto the bed. I wrapped myself in the old comforter on my parents bed. It still smelled like them. I feel teas pricking my eyes. Thy finally spill over and I lay there crying until I fall asleep.