FML...

FML...Part Two

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Monday June 5, 5:45 PM

I clutched my brand new iphone to my cheek. I could feel hot tears running down my face. I looked up from my floor to my mirror hanging across from me.  I looked like hell. Mascara was streaming down my face in crooked lines and smudges. My blue eyes were puffy and red. I looked... defeated. I didn't care. The phone buzzed in my ear. Pick up, please just pick up your phone. I held the pregnancy test I had just taken only a couple minutes ago, the other three I had taken lay on my bathroom counter hidden from my vision. Please pick up your damn phone. On the fourth ring he answered.

"Heyyy sexy! I was just gonna call you! My parents arent home if, you know, you wanna go for round two?" I could hear him giggle, I knew he was smiling.

"I need to talk to you." I said slowly

"Krista? What's wrong?"

"Just come over."

"Please just tell me whats wrong. Your freaking me out!" He was pleading, he sounded scared. He should be.

"Zack" I said calmly "We have a problem."

"I'll be there in 10."

Monday June 5, 5:56 PM

My bed sank a little as he sat down. I was facing him sitting crosslegged, waiting for him to get comfortable. Oh boy, here we go. "So, theres really no easy way to say this but uhm.." I sat there, the words were stuck in my mouth. I felt like i needed a spoon to dig them out. I looked him in the eyes, he was scared.

"Just tell me Krista." He said slowly. He sat still and watched me cautiously.

"Im pregnant."

"What?"

"Im pregnant.."

"No.."

"Yup."

"How do you know?" Zack asked in disbelieve. I could see his whole body stiffen,  his eyes looked paniced.

"At home pregnancy test."

"Those things arent ever right! I bet nine times outta ten they're wrong!"

"Well... I took it four times."  His chest sunk. Zack slumped his head into his broad hands. His posture made me sad. Why couldn't he be strong for me? Be a man, Jesus! Its not like he had to be carrying this baby for nine months and have everybody stare at him with pity and disbelieve. It seemed like hours had passed before I could hear him start to breath again.

"What now baby?" He lifted his head and gazed at me and just like that  I broke down. Zack immediatly wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into his lap. I cried and cried and cried and cried. Zack held me and stroked my hair, I buried my face into his chest. I just wanted to hide. I just wanted it all to go away. I can't deal wtih this. "I'll always be here for you Krista. I will not leave you. Ever." I held my hands over my eyes to try and push the tears back into my body. I wanted to stop balling but I  couldn't. The tears just wouldn't stop. I started to cough and gag from crying so hard. This really does suck ass.

Tuesday June 6, 11:46 AM

"First day of the fucking summer and this is what im doing?" I mummbled under my breath.

"You have to do this, I'll be right next to you baby." Zack breathed into my hair as he kissed my forehead.  We were standing together right outside my kitchen door. I could hear my parents inside bussling around making lunch and tidying up. My heart painfully pounded in my chest. I really couldnt breath. "Ready?"

"No.." I breathed. Zack pushed on the kitchen door, It squeaked open slowly. As it opened completely i could see my parents, my mother was peeling carrots while my father cleaned our big bay window. It overlooked a large meadow and a small stream . I wish i was in that stream right now, letting the water run smoothly past my legs, the baby pebbles firmly pressed to the soles of my feet, the wind whispering through the willow trees. I closed my eyes and imagined it.

"Honey? You need something." My mother's voice pulled me back to the kitchen. I opened my eyes quickly and suddenly felt closterphobic. I was pinned, my instincts told me to flee but I needed to stay. I had to do this.

"We need to talk to you guys. I have something to tell you." I said slowly and quietly.