Nikki Sixx Fantasies

A Moment Of Need/98

It figures I pay for the damn room and I end up out in the hall because my friend and brother decide to get it on, on the plus side the Crue Concert was awesome. The only problem about being alone is it gave me to much time to think. Leaving my mind to sink into darker thoughts of fear and death. The images like a movie on replay behind my eyes. I didn't want to think about death, not unless it was my own. The thought of my bottle of Valium crossing my mind. I shook it off I just wanted to keep the images at bay. Looking down I realize the bottle of vodka in my hand it's empty. I still tip it back hoping for one last taste. I was gonna need more. I wasn't near drunk enough yet not oblivious, not passed out, not beyond thought.

"Damn I hate when that happens" the voice came from behind me making me jump, I turned to say something nasty and came face to face or at least face to chest with Nikki Sixx.

"You lost, locked out, forgot your room number" his teasing making me smile and also making me realize I'd been staring up at him kinda starstruck.

"Hey I'm not that drunk." I answer slurring my every word.

"If you say so Chick" he laughs noticing my bare feet "Lose your shoes?"

I look at my feet and shrug "Shoes are over rated".

"Chick are you even old enough to drink?" taking in my appearance short just chest high to him, long black hair, large dark brown eyes, small breasts.

I Rolls my eyes "Just turned 26 and you can call me Jenny".

"OK Chick. Why are you out here anyway?" the sound of the headboard hitting the wall giving him the reason without me having to say a thing. I blush. He starts laughing and turns to unlock his door.

"Come on you can come hang for awhile" Wow this is a turn of events, since I had just been considering downing a whole bottle of Valium a few seconds ago.

There wasn't anywhere else to sit so I plant myself on the bed my back up against the headboard I set the bottle on the nightstand still kinda bemoaning the fact that it was empty. With a sigh I rest my head on my knee my hand absently playing with the leather pouch hanging from around my neck. I feel the ring, without looking inside I know there is a small braid of hair wrapped around it. My husbands' wedding ring I remember the day I slipped it on his finger that was over seven years ago, it's only been six months since the man at the mortuary handed it back to me. It is so vivid in my mind "So sorry for your loss" he says. I guess that is what he says to everyone. "So quiet now" his voice breaking into my thoughts.

"Sorry...kinda at a loss for words" I say quietly.

"Like the shirt" he smirks as he reads my black widow tee "Yes we could mate but then I would have to kill you."

"Thanks" smiles sadly it had appealed to my dark sense of irony when I bought it.

"Are you alright, will you be alright while I shower?"

I laugh sarcastically God do I look as pathetic as I feel. "Yes!" i snap. "Oh Sorry , I didn't mean, Oh sorry."

"Attitude is better then the I just lost my best friend look you had just a few minutes ago" I watch as he walks into the bathroom the door closing behind him

" I did" I whisper.

I hear the sound of the shower being turned on. Sliding down on the bed i curl up and close my eyes, the sound of water lolling me to sleep.

"Please Chuck calm down! what's wrong? I know I'm not reaching him, his voice raised his words incoherent "Please put it down, I love you" I look up so I can look him into his eyes and the gun goes off his eyes widen I see the fear. He knows he's fucked up. The light in his eyes fades. I watch as he falls backwards onto our bed.