Bella And Jacob or Edward

Chapter 10

Today was Friday. A day after the break up. I was in Edward's car to drop off Alice's clothes.

The car was silent. No music, talking, not even moving around.

I was not in the mood for talking. If I talk, I cry and when I cry I can't stop.

It was a rough night. Couldn't sleep, couldn't think, I could only manage thinking about Jake.

I feel bad for him. He doesn't deserve any of this. Why can't I take a relationship seriously.

I looked out the window of the small Volvo to see the house coming up. As the car stopped I avoided eye contact with Edward.

How can I face him when I can't even face myself?? If only I wasn't an infection.

I get boys who really like me and then I kill or really hurt them. I walked inside.

"Hi Bella." Alice said being happy as usual.

I nodded at her.

"Here. Its a baseball ball tee. Its blue and gray. And then I put leggings and black converse in the bag as well." I said expressionless.

She gave me a look and then shook it off.

"Bella. Why did you give me these clothes. You know I hate casual." Alice said rolling her eyes.

I smiled. She's back. She hates casual now! Finally, I'm tired of lending her my clothes and then not being able to wear them.

Emmett walked over to me and whispered in my ear.

"She had her tantrum about it yesterday." He chuckled then walked away.

"I'm serious Bella. This is child abuse!!" Alice yelled.

I giggled. God she overreacts.

"Oh Al, be strong. The week is done by tomorrow."

I walked upstairs and Edward followed. Without looking up from the floor, I walked into his room.

Edward came in and sat on the couch with me.

"Bella. What's wrong." Edward asked all sentimental.

I avoided eye contact.

"Nothing." I said harshly.

Edward moved to be in front of my face but I looked to where he was sitting before.

"Really. Because you seem pretty upset.
"

Can't he just respect my privacy. Gosh, people these days.

They see a police officer drive past them and they automatically follow.

"Nothing, now leave me alone!" I said pushing him away from me.

He stood up and started pacing around the room, probably thinking about what my mood is about.

He stopped and gave me his pity look. "I'm sorry Bella."

He found out. Great. No one can mind there own business. I got mad then.

"I don't need your pity!" I say standing up.

"Just because he found out about the kiss and broke up with me, doesn't mean you can just move in on me!!"

Edward looked startled. But I kept going. I needed to get this off my chest
........all of it.

"You said one second! 'Bella. One second won't matter. You've been with him for months. He won't mind'!!!!! I yelled mocking him.

After a while Edward finally spoke. I guess I scared him. Honestly I scared myself.

This isn't me. I don't yell at people or scare them. Damn it! Now I feel bad.

"Listen. I didn't think he'd find out and I'm not hitting on you! I'm trying to be a friend and comfort you!" Edward said calmly.

"I don't need you're comfort! If I want that I can go to Angela." I said walking out of his room.

Edward grabbed my wrist and made me look at him.

"Fine. Go to her but remember that I'm just trying to help!"

I twisted out of his grip and stared glaring at him.

"Yeah, whatever." I ran out of the house.

Oh my gosh! Why did I do that. I'm so stupid!!!

I looked around and realized where I was. The garden. Our garden.

A tear streamed down my face and soon after that, a river.

I sat on the grass and just cried. Cried because of Jake, Edward, and the nightmare I call my life.

What good is supposed to come out of this mess!! I think crying harder.

My chest starts to hurt and so does my head. I lay on the flowers for a pillow and close my eyes.

If only my life could slip away from the torture. And with that thought, I drifted off.