Lost

Chapter 4: All About Vanessa Rizzi

• Vanessa's P.O.V•

I wasn't ready to raise a kid. They were going to take her away from me. I wasn't a "suitable parent". I couldn't let anyone hurt my little Mia. Especially not her father. Her father left me a month before Mia was born but not before these promising words escaped his lips " When I come back I'm taking her and killing her, I don't want my child to have any part of you. Just wait Ness I'll be back." I shuddered at the remembrance of those words goosebumps forming on my arms. Where would I take her that she'd be safe? I had no clue. I asked friends of mine but that didn't quite seem like a plan because most of my friends had been Zane's friends. Zane was the baby father. I drove around looking for nice little houses swiping hot angry tears that were flowing freely down my face. I looked in the mirror at my sleeping baby girl with her thumb in her mouth clutching tightly onto the bear I'd gotten her when she was first born. More tears. I was going to leave her at a nice looking house and then I was going on the hunt for Zane. I'm going to kill him before he even gets a glimpse at Mia. First I needed to find him. I need to get my life together. No more heavy makeup, no more partying. I was going to get my act together and going to do a complete wardrobe change and make sure I looked like a suitable parent. Different enough that Zane wouldn't even begin to recognize me. I was even thinking of getting my name changed. I stopped in front of this huge house that looked like it belonged to a nice family. I shut the engine off and touched up my makeup so Mia wouldn't notice I'd been crying. I waited a few minutes just staring at Mia noticing every little thing about her I'd be sure not to forget. Like the deep dimple on the left side of her cheek. Her beautiful dark brown almost black curly natural hair which was styled in a side ponytail puffed up. Then I stopped looking at her because I could feel the tears welling up in my tear ducts threatening to fall at any given point. I unbuckled my seatbelt stepped out of the car and opened the Mia's door. I unbuckled her seat belt and pulled her out of the car. Her beautiful dark brown eyes popped open and a yawn came out of her small pink lips. I smiled faintly " Good Morning beautiful " I said before swiping a loose strand behind her ear. " Where are we mommy? " Mia asked. My heart instantly shattered at the word 'mommy' but I couldn't say anything, I'd just start flowing tears like a great waterfall. I set her down on the steps of the house and bent down so I was crouching in front of her and gave her a long hug and kissed her face. Her small hands grabbed my shoulders and she laid her head there. I inhaled the sweet smell of baby lotion on her and smiled softly as my breath hitched in my throat. I needed to leave now before I cried. I let go of her and stood up delivering three sharp knocks on the front door then I turned and ran back to the car but not before whispering " I love you and I'll be back I promise." It was more of a promise to myself than to her but now for my change and getting my act together. I hopped in the car and drove off looking at the confused and sad face on Mia. I'll be back I promise, I kept repeating those four words over and over. I would be back and soon.