Love Is Complicated

I have never completely loved myself. I may have liked aspects of me, but I was never happy with everything.
I had never loved anyone more than my parents but then I grew up.
It was boy after boy, chasing them in the hope they might love me back. I was delusional.
It took me awhile to realise I wasn't in love with them, I loved being in love.
Then she came along. She was breathtakingly beautiful. And that's when I realised. I had never loved a boy because I wasn't supposed to.
I was always supposed to love a girl. A few months later we were together. Everyone hated us. We were bullied for being ourselves.
I never let it get to me, but she did.
It was like magic.
One day she was here the next she wasn't.
I missed her. I loved her. And now I was empty.

I was broken.

Not a day goes by where I don't think about her. Her laugh. Her smile. Her beautiful blue eyes.
I feel nothing else but grief. I can't stand it.

I give up. I want to be with her.

And so I will.

To my parents I am sorry. After she slipped away I have been nothing but an empty shell of my former self. My grief has bested me.

I wish I could have been the daughter you deserved.

I know now that this is my last day as I have no reason to continue.

I am sorry, but this is my choice.

I'm so tired, I just want to sleep I'm her arms again.

I hope one day you can forget your grief and forgive me.

Goodbye.