Ciel's Dream of Betrayal

That night, Ciel dreams of one of his fears. Rejection. He dreams of being rejected. It was early in the morning, about six a.m. when Ciel woke up and turned around in the bed to get a good morning kiss from Sebastian to find the other side of the bed empy, cold, and uninviting.

It was only a minute later that Sebastian came in acting the role as he did before-the perfect butler. Surprised-Ciel tried to cover up his emotions that he felt inside; hurt and betrayed that Sebastian would even think of acting like this. Did what they had mean nothing to him? He turned his face away from the other so he couldn't tell what he was feeling. Ciel cursed inwardly as he stutters, “S-Sebastian. Why are you acting like this? Like you don't love me?”

Sebastian smirks as he lifts the tea pot that he had brought with him on a tray with white gloved hands and tilts it, pouring tea into the tea cup then hands it to Ciel. He chuckles as the other takes the cup and sips at the hot liquid then says, “You think that I love you? I'm very sorry, young master, but you are sorely mistaken. I never loved you and I never will. I thought that I told you that Demons could never love, that they don't have the ability to love? I only acted like I did because I wanted a toy to mess around with.”

Sebastian's words cut through Ciel like a brutal knife and he lets out a soft gasp as all of the air left him like he'd been hit and he looked at Sebastian with a pained expression, “Y-you never loved loved me?” he stutters out, “You lied to me.” His last words are harsh and laced with venom as his gaze turns cold and uninviting, hiding the fact that he painfully felt his heart ripping in two. It was painful, he could feel it, a harsh pain in his chest, though not physically caused, it was still there and he blinked back his tears as they threatened to betray him also and spill over. “You lied to me, saying that you loved me, knowing that that was what I wanted most, for you to love me.” The same venom and hate lace his words, as though each word speaks of the pain that he is going through.

Sebastian chuckles darkly and shakes his head, “No, I did not lie when I said that I cared for you.” He watches his young master carefully, noticing the slight hopefulness that he seemed to radiate at his words. “I care for you like any butler would for their young master. It's only expected of me.”

Ciel frowns and bites his lip, looking back at Sebastian with a pained and hurt expression, then he covers it up with anger as he glares at Sebastian and lifts his hand up, bringing it down forcefully and letting go of the tea cup so it smashed on the floor, just like how his heart had been smashed to pieces. Ciel then looks away from Sebastian, muttering, “Everything was fake...” He looks back up at the other and frowns, then utters, “Get out.” Loudly, ordering then, he orders, “GET OUT!!” He waits until Sebastian leaves, bringing the tray with him before letting out a choked sob and burying his face in his hands, knowing that he would never trust himself to love again. He had lost too many people, and this was just too cruel, too heartless. He knew that he couldn't deal with this again. And his real life self showed his distress as he clenched the blankets and pushed away from Sebastian, as if deep down he was repulsed to be near the other, even while sleeping. His dream encouraged his subconcious fear that Sebastian didn't love him, that he was tricking him and he knew that he would close up in the real life as well so as to avoid the hurt that he felt now, as if he was awake.

Ciel lays down and curls up into a ball on the bed as he clenches both of his hands into fists and his nails press so hard into his palm that they break the skin and blood runs through his fingers and down his hand onto the mattress below. His pained sobs continued to leave him as he screams out at the top of his lungs, “I HATE YOU, SEBASTIAN!!! I HATE YOU!!!” He sat up and moved to the edge of the bed, avoiding the broken tea cut and moving to the wall, punching it with one hand, and instantly regretted it, as his hand now hurt as well. He glances around the room, as if expecting Sebastian to appear out of the shadows at any moment, like he did so often now in his dreams. “I never want to see you again.” He says in a low voice, knowing that the other can still hear him. “Unless it is to protect me, I don't want to see you.” He leaned against the wall then slid down it, his pained cries ceasing slightly, “I can't believe I was that stupid...” he mutters out. “I trusted a demon with my heart, and it got smashed. I only got what I deserved.”