I Dont Care

Finding out and comfort

Allen Pov

I walked into the house, present in hand.My brother and I shared this house.  I smiled, but then I heard repeated creaking, and moans. I started walking towards where the sound was coming from, matt's room. I slowly opened the door, but I wish I hadnt. There on the bed I had slept with who I thought loved me,was Mathieu. Prussia underneath him, writhing around, moaning loudly as he came to his release. Matt met his also and looked up, staring me straight in my crimson eyes with his light amethyst. He frowned, "oh fuck" he whispered. My mind was blank, I was just a fuck buddy?!. "Matt...I thought..." I frowned,"apparently I was wrong." I looked at the cardboard box in my hand with utter disgust. In the box was a picture of me sitting on matts lap asleep with him petting my hair reading a book, Oliver had taken the picture for his scrapbooks. (WHY DID HE EVEN HAVE THOSE??!!) I had asked for a picture of me and Matt at a peaceful state for a present. I felt a hand touch my shoulder,a hand that had been used for, pain,pleasure and comfort. I turned and saw Matt...and snapped, I raised my left hand and back handed him a scowl on my face. The sheer power of the slap made him fall, and as I ran out of the house the bag still in hand, I ran to the only place I could now find comfort in. Olivers. And as I ran, if you were observent enough, would have seen a tear, slip past my eyes

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Once at Oliver's, I hesitated. What if he didnt care either...no!, this oliver were talking about! With new confidence I knocked on the door of my older brother, hopefully loud enough for the brit to hear. A second later the door opened, but it wasn't Oliver, it was, sadly, france. His eyes widened at the tear track on my face"OLIVER, GET YOUR BUTT DOWN HERE, WE HAVE A PROBLEM!" He shouted. In five seconds flat Oliver was down stairs and frowning, I looked down pitifully. I also realized something, I was wearing matts jacket, just the thought of the one I used to love made me fall to my knees and cry for the first time since 9/11. My mind had gone into its once childish state again, and I did something I hadnt did in years, I called out my brothers nick name "OLLY-Y!" I screamed, needing comfort like a 5 year old. My cry snapped my brother back to reality, "AL!" He yelled rushing to my side, hugging me and letting me cry on his shoulder. "Shhh, shhhhh its okay, its okay" He whispered, in my ear. I felt a hand rub my back, I hadnt felt comfort in so long, I wrapped my arms around my brother, squeezing tight. Slowly ,but surely , my cried softened into small whimpers and occasional sob."o-olly-y" I whimpered,he smiled"what al?" He whispered sweetly"why does the world hate me?" I asked ,as I passed out. To be honest, I wasnt suprised, I hadnt eaten or slept for days, I had been depressed, olly and matt being the only ones who knew. Matt had been my main comfort, but now...I wished I was able to die.