UltraViolence

Ch.1

Song- Therapy by All Time Low

Circles. I'm going in circles . Two-hundred and fifteen stars, yesterday I counted three-hundred twenty seven.

I'm laying In my bed staring up at my ceiling. It has many stars and I go in circles counting them. I know there's about a million plus but every time I get around four hundred my mind messes me up and brings me back into reality.

I like star gazing. It helps me calm down when I'm about to have a panic attack. I don't like many things. I try to look back up at the stars and count again from one until I heard my name being called. I ignored it and proceeded counting stars.

"Arabella!" My step-father yelled louder this time.

I look away and sigh. I got up from my bed and started walking to my door, as I was about to open it, the door slammed open and he entered the room drunk with bloodshot eyes holding a beer bottle in his hand. He took a swing of it before he started talking.

"Where were you?" He slurred angrily

I didn't flinch at his harshness because I was use to this. He'd always come into my room pissed drunk and start asking me questions.

"I was in my room" I said quietly avoiding eye contact. He grabbed my jaw and made me look at him

"Fucking look at me when I'm talking to you bitch!" He yelled slurring his words.

"Sorry" I said starting to get slightly scared. He tipped his head back and downed more of the beer. I cautiously took a step back.

"Go to the store and buy yourself dinner. I'm leaving" he grumbled before tumbling out my room. I let out a breath of relief and closed my door. I heard the front door slam so I now know he's gone and I'm alone. It's around seven- thirty I should get going. I went to put on leggings and a purple hoodie and I slipped on my boots, grabbed my keys and headed outside.

I'm sitting in the car and I'm trying to start it but it wouldn't turn on. I tried a couple more times before I gave up. I hit my head against the steering wheel and let out a groan of annoyance. I got out the car and slammed the door. I went back inside and grabbed my house keys and locked the door. I'm going to walk to a gas station now. It's around eight now and it's starting to get a bit dark so I put my hood over my head and continued walking.

My neighborhood isn't safe and I know I shouldn't be walking out this late but I just can't stand being in that house.

As I'm walking I see and alley to my right and I'm hearing screams from in there.

I debated on wether I should check it out or keep walking. I heard the scream again so I got a little closer to see what was happening but it was too dark and the only light was in the middle of the alley. I decided to go and check out what was happening.

When I went in there everything got so quiet. I looked around and saw nothing, I decided it was probably my head making me imagine the screams. I decided I should just keep walking Straight because the gas station was around the corner.

I took two steps then a hand was put over my mouth. I didn't bother to attempt to scream or push the person off, though the person said "shh" I guess he noticed I was not fighting back when so he released me

"Who are you, and what are you doing here?" He asked me. His voice was so deep. I tried to get a good look at him but it was too dark, I noticed he had curly hair and was very tall.

I didn't answer him I just turned around and tried to walk away nonchalantly. I thought I was good until I felt a harsh tug on my wrist that made me turn around. I gave him a blank face even though he couldn't see me.

"I asked you a question and i expect an answer from you!" He shouted at my face. Still I held no emotion. I opened my mouth to tell him my name but then I stopped myself and just starred at him hoping maybe he would just leave me alone.

From the position he was in I could slightly see the outline of his face from the little light. He looked young, maybe a year or two older than me. I realized I was starring so I looked away and still didn't answer him.

"Why aren't you afraid" he said sounding very frustrated. I still didn't answer him and attempted to leave again and this time he let me but not without adding "don't come here again it's not safe." Walking towards the light and that was when I saw his face.

He was very attractive u thought but I didn't acknowledge his beauty and I turned away and went to get some snacks.

I arrived at the gas station two minutes after that incident with that kid. I went in and got myself French vanilla coffee and a few donuts and made my way home. I was approaching the alley when I realized I probably shouldn't go that way. I took the long way home and got there in ten minutes.

When I came home no one was there. Mom probably has a late night shift I thought. I went to my room and closed my door and went to wash my face to refresh myself.

I sat on my bed with my donuts and started eating them. I know it's unhealthy to eat a lot like I am but I don't care at the moment. I got my coffee and brought it up to take a sip until I heard a crash from downstairs. I furrowed my eyes and put my coffee down. I stood up and went to see who was here.

I opened my door and went to the top of the stair and there I saw Jeff my step dad knocked out on the ground in the living room. I shook my head and went back into my room. I lost my appetite and put my food in my mini cooler and laid in my bed.

This is my favorite thing to do, count stars and look at them. I love this room so much, my father made the stars on top of my bed when I was around 8 years old. He put them in my room so when I'm not at his house I wouldn't miss him too much.That was 11 years ago, I'm 19 now and I miss him a lot, he died when I was 10 and my mother married Jeff when I was 13 and ever since I have been ruined. I try not to hate people but I hate Jeff so much, more than anything.

I try to convince myself I hate my mother too because she married that man, and stopped showing her love for me. But I could never hate her, but I tell myself I do. A tear slipped out my eye and I realized I was crying. I haven't cried in a while since Jeff... I don't even want to think about that.

I go up and put my hands over my face and started crying more. I got up and went to my bathroom and ran a bath because I felt dirty when Jeff touched my shoulder. When the bath was ready I stripped my clothes and threw them aside then got in. I cry when I think of the things that have happened to me, and when I think of my father.

I looked up at the ceiling and more tears fell. I stayed in the bath for ten more minutes until my body felt uncomfortable, then I went to the shower and rinsed my body.

I went to get my underwear and bra and I put them on then I put on shorts and a tank top and went to my bed. I did enough crying tonight and I was very exhausted, it drained my body. I laid on my bed and looked up at the stars and started to count them again until I fell asleep.

A:N/ heyy I hope this chapter was alright. The rest will be longer and more Understandable. This chapter was a little info about how she lives. I didn't give any information about her but her age and I did that so I could introduce her feelings and how she's treated in this chapter. The next one will be and introduction to her life and so on. I hope y'all enjoy this book!!xx:) hehe