Impotent |n.s|

Chapter 10

When you're young you always get everything you want by crying or whining. Harry wanted to rewind time right now, he wanted to go back to those days where he could just cry to Anne about not getting his favorite ice cream or not getting the comic book he wanted to read, he always knew that the older woman he called "Mom" would always get him everything her son needed. Right now, Harry wanted to call his mother up and tell her how badly he wanted Niall. It was just a feeling in the pit of his stomach, making his insides clench in a painful manner as he witnessed Niall talking to the raven haired guy, who Harry admits, looked way better than him.

Harry had always been a self conscious boy. Growing up, he was teased a lot because of the slow manner in which he spoke. He never took the comments to heart, or well, at least pretended to not mind them at all but there was always this tiny void in his heart telling him he will never be enough. To top it all off, Harry never had any stable relationships which gave the boys in his school something else to tease him over. The word "fag" was a new addition in middle school kids dictionary and what better way to put their new found vocabulary to use other than bullying Harry with the term? 

When he became 16 years old, he auditioned for X-Factor, with absolutely no hopes of getting in. He simply went over on a whim and also to please the old ladies at the bakery who thought Harry was god's gift. He enjoyed singing while baking the cakes or some new cookies and it seemed like his co-workers enjoyed this just as much. 

So, here was Harry, watching the guy he wanted so very badly to become intimate with, smiling at a guy who Harry claimed was beautiful from every angle possible. Maybe this is why Zayn and Harry never got along. It wasn't that they were always competing or anything, Harry had his own fans while Zayn definitely had his. There was absolutely no competition but there was still some sort of a rivalry prevailing between the two, only on Harry's part but it was still there. And what was taking place in front of his very own eyes made him want to punch Zayn Malik in the face until it was completely unrecognizable. Call Harry territorial or possessive but he wasn't the innocent cupcake everyone thought of him to be. 

"You look like you want to punch someone," the strangely silver haired woman asked him, sitting on the bar stool right next to Harry. "I'm Lou. Niall's hair stylist and make up artist." She placed her highly manicured hands in front of Harry and for a second he wondered why she was talking to him. But like the polite man he is, he shook hands with her, forcing a smile to appear on his face while keeping a close eye on whatever Zayn and Niall were doing. 

"He's not interested in Zayn," Lou chuckled, clearly seeing how stressed Harry was over everything. She won't admit it out loud but she loved how Zayn treated Niall. There was something about the way Zayn looked and talked to Niall that made Lou wonder whether he'd give the raven haired lad at least one shot. But knowing Niall's past, she dared not speak about it to anyone. Even Louis, who was the closest Niall has ever had to a boyfriend or a lover. 

"How do you know that?" Harry raised his eyebrows at the woman, still watching Niall as he laughed once again at something Zayn said. Harry could see the fond in Zayn's eyes and wondered why he was feeling jealous? Wasn't Niall just supposed to be a quick fuck and nothing else? Wasn't Harry just out here to get Niall to his bed? Hell, this was the second time they were meeting properly (Harry had researched a lot over the blonde so, he knew almost everything internet could offer but that's not the point), you don't just fall in love in the second meeting! Of course Harry wasn't in love. This was just physical attraction and he kept on chanting this in his mind, as if trying to convince himself that Niall meant nothing to him. 

"Because I know Niall," she smiled kindly at him and wanted him to feel better. She hated how Harry had his brows furrowed and wanted to scold Niall for whatever he was doing to this beautiful boy but it wasn't her place and she was well aware of that.