The Understanding Cowboy

Chapter 5

Miranda's pov

"I have to go home. I'm sorry." I whimper, trying to pull my hand free. "No. I can't let you go with them. They'll just hurt you again." He gasps, beggingly. Tears stream down my face. My dad's hands on my shoulders and Jason's hand clasped around my arm. Jason's dad pulls him back as my dad pulls me. He drags me inside and shoves me against the wall. "You're not seeing that boy. He's dangerous." My eyes go wide, my jaw dropping. "He's dangerous?! He's dangerous?! You've got to be kidding me!!" I yell, grabbing my arms and yanking the bandages off. The wounds still fresh. "This is dangerous!" I scream. Mom and dad both stare at me shocked. "What... Did you do to yourself?" Mom gasps. I stare daggers at them both. "I didn't do it. Your son did. John took a potato peeler to me while Dave held me down!" I yell, cowering in a ball against the wall. "That's why Jason beat the crap out of him!"

Jason's pov

I run up the steps, fists clenched, prepared to knock on the door. "Because he loves me! Even if you don't!" What's going on in there?! "She's lying!" One of her brothers yell. "No I'm not!" "You're probably just trying to get attention." I slam my fist on the door and all talking ceases. The door swings open. Her brother. The one I beat up. He glares at me with rage filled eyes then shoves me off the stoop. I lose my footing, falling on my back.

Miranda's pov

I hear John and Jason arguing then I hear a scuffle. "Don't make me kick your ass again." Jason says. I hear him cry out in pain and rage boils over in me. I stand up and walk to the door. There's a baseball bat near it. I pick it up. John's back to me. Jason on the ground, holding his nose which is bleeding. "You can't hurt me anymore!" I scream. He turns around and I whack him with the bat. "Don't ever touch him again!!" I yell, pounding him until someone grabs me around the waist and I drop the bat. "Shh shh. I've got you." Jason whispers. I rest my hands on his arms which are around me, holding my arms down. Tears burning my cheeks. I turn around, looking at the guy who saved my life. "Jason," I whisper. "Yeah?" "I love you." I gasp, kissing him, my arms on his arms, my cuts stinging but I ignore it. We stare at each other for several seconds. "I love you too." He says, kissing me again. "We have to get John to the hospital." Mom says. I glance back at him and realize what I did. "Oh my God, mom I'm so sorry. It was just pure instinct." I whimper. "Shut up!" Mom shouts bending down to John. I bury my face in Jason's chest. "I'm going to jail." I whimper. "No you ain't." He says, holding me.

*a few days later*

Jason's pov

I go to Rachel and Sierra's house while she's up at the hospital with her brother. He's gonna live although I wish he wouldn't. "What's up, Jay?" "She beat her brother with a bat for me. He was attacking me. She said it was an instinct." I mumble, my hands shaking. "She's scared thinking she'll go to jail." Sierra brings over a beer. "Thanks." I whisper, cracking it open. I slip my hand in my pocket, my fingers closing around the razorblade. I probably shouldn't be carrying it with me but I am. And the girls don't know. Someone knocks on the door. Sierra opens it. "Girl, you don't have to knock." What did she mean by it was instinct? She sits beside me, Sierra closes the door. "Mom says if John doesn't make it I might as well not come back." "Fine by me." I gripe. Her eyes go wide. "I meant cause I don't want you to go back. They treat you like crap!" "I know but what else can I do?" I sit up. "You know what." I say. She looks over. I glance at the girls, looking at them meaning give us privacy. They leave the room. "You can come with me. Please I want you outta there." "I can't. They won't let me." I don't care about them. "Come here, hun." She scoots over, laying her head on my chest, my arms wrap around her. Her phone vibrates. "Ugh mom wants me back." I don't lose my hold or lighten up. "You can't go back." "I have to. I'm sorry." She gasps, turning around. "Not yet." I say, kissing her gently. Her hands land on my shoulders. I deepen the kiss, laying her on the arm of the couch as we make out. One hand moves to my hair. I slip my hands under her shirt, on her sides, slowly sliding her shirt off. My eyes go wide though seeing her arms. There's so many scars. How many times did she cut herself? Her arms are covered. "Babe, you have to stop this." I shakily say, my hands on her arms. Then I remember I have a blade in my pocket. Why do I have a blade in my pocket? I don't know. Now the moment is gone. "I've-I've gotta go." She says, standing up and grabbing her shirt. I stare at my hands. "I-I'll see ya later." I mumble. She leaves and the girls come back out. "What happened there?" Ugh. "You guys weren't watching us were you?" "No." "I-I completely froze when I saw her arms and shoulders. She's way worse than I was. It's like she did every hour!" "You have to go after her. She probably thinks you hate her now." I shakily stand up. They're right. I run out the door.

Miranda's pov

I knew it. Now he doesn't want me. Now he sees that I'm a freak! I knew it was a mistake getting in a relationship. I cry into my pillow, twisting the sheet in my hands. I walk to the bathroom and grab a razorblade. "I'm not good enough for him or anyone!" I whimper.

Jason's pov

I run up the stairs. Her parents are still at the hospital. I hear her crying in the bathroom. The door is open.

Miranda's pov

"Baby stop!" My hands freeze, the blade inches from my skin. I turn around. Jason's got a blade in his hand too. "You drop yours, I'll drop mine." He says, holding it up in the air with just two fingers. I clasp mine tightly and slowly move it towards my arm. "Stop!" He gasps. "I can't." I whimper. "You cut yourself, I'll cut myself." I can't let him do that! "No, Jason, don't!" "Then drop the blade." His voice wavers. I shakily lift it in the air and let it drop to the floor. The only sound is it clattering and our terrified breathing. He drops his and walks over, kissing me hard. My eyes go wide, shocked. He still loves me? He pins my hands against the wall, lacing his fingers with mine. "You still want me? After seeing the real me?" "Baby I'll always want you. Don't you doubt that. Don't you ever EVER think otherwise. I'll always love you and I'll always want you." Tears come to my eyes and he kisses me again. He picks me up, catching me by surprise and carries me to my room down the hall.

*later*

I stare at the ceiling, my fingers laced with his. I scoot closer to him, burying my face in his side. "You alright?" He asks, turning over to look right at me. I nod. "Better than I've been in a while." I whisper, tucking a hand behind my head to look at him better. "Thank you." I whisper. He smiles and rests a hand on my cheek. "You don't need to thank me for loving you." I sit up and kiss him again, my hands around his neck, his wrap around my waist. Then I hear the door open. My hands freeze, my eyes widen. "They're gonna kill me! I'm not even supposed to be near you!" Tears start falling. "The door's locked. Just stay quiet." He whispers, pulling me to his chest. I put a fist in my mouth to keep from crying. "Shh. It's okay." He whispers, rubbing my back. I know I'm safe. He's gonna take care of me. I want to run away with him. Get away from my parents and brothers. "I love you too." I whisper, closing my eyes, slowly drifting off to sleep in his arms.