Falling Without a Doubt

For the past couple days I've been talking to the sweetest guy online, he's funny, awesome, handsome, he always makes me smile and is the one of the only people that can cheer me up. The worst part about it all is, he lives on the other side of the ocean, in Europe. 

My phone dings, its my girlfriend, I sigh. I regret it, alot. I mean, she's one of my best friends, dating her is going to ruin our friendship horribly. I text her quickly then return to my Algebra homework, sighing. I tell her I have to go after a couple minutes, then end up quickly finishing my homework. I put it back in my folder then log on myYearbook on my phone, I smile when I see he's on. I start sending him questions, talking to him that way. 

I bang my head against the wall silently, thinking about doing things I shouldnt when in a relationship with another person. I sigh, he doesnt know how much he has me hooked, and I doubt he has any feelings for me, probably just the girl that hurt him.

Anger flares within me, how could someone hurt him?! He's everything anyone could ever ask for, plus more. Tears start to sting my eye, threatening to fall. 

I sigh and go up to my room, going on my laptop til my mom sends me a text saying to come downstairs, I take my phone with me, making sure I had a way to talk to him when I left. 

I get into the car, smiling at one of his answers. I click on his profile and click the ask question button and reply, closing my phone for a minute before checking again.

After going to Taco Bell and McDonalds I rush into the house, up the stair, and get my laptop. I bring it downstairs and place it on the table, logging onto myYearbook and starting to eat my dinner. I start talking to him about how good his story is, then something I never expected to happen, happened.

'I like...Love you' I read off the screen and my breath catches in my throat, my heart starting to speed up. And then, to ruin the moment, my  phone dings, I check it, my girlfriend. 

'Cassandra...' I type as reply to her, then reply to him, 'Like as a friend...Or Love, love?' and then sigh, waiting for his reply. 

'Love, love' I read off the end. I choke of the fry I just started to chew. Then I do something, I break up with my girlfriend. Bitchy thing to do, right? 

In my defense, I didnt want to lead her on...

'Holy shit.' I reply to him,

'Now I regret telling you' is part of what he replies,

'Dont regret it, I just didnt think you thought of me that way...' I reply.

My heart is still speeding and I start to think this is one of those freakin cheesy things that means I'm in love, I totally except that. I love him.

______________________________

I wake up to my alarm, I smile. I fell asleep after talking to him til he fell asleep. I log on and refresh the page, it says theres no new things so I go on Wattpad and read a story. My iPod dings, 'Asking Alexander sent you a message' it reads and I squeal, I actually SQUEALED. I go and talk to him.

As yesterday was the best day of my life, I find out later in the day today would be the worst.

At the end of art the teacher tells us we can chill, so I go on my phone, I smile, he has messaged me back. I reply to him. after a minute I click messages to see if there are any new ones and my heart stops. 'No messages' reads my inbox. WHERE ARE THE MESSAGES FROM HIM?!

I go and check my friendslist, hes gone. I check the comments on my things from him, no picture or name, just a comment. My heart stops and my breath catches in my throat as I do the last thing to see if what I think is correct.

I log onto the internet, logging in and clicking to go to him profile.

'Sorry, there is no profile for the member you are trying to view' the page reads. 

My life comes crashing down.

Ok, I wrote this from real experience. This, is what happened to me the happiest and worst day of my life, the first time I fell in love. It has been 50 something hours since I've last learned from Alexander, and I miss him more than anything. Ive barely slept the past two nights and the small dreams Ive had when Ive slept were of being in his arms.

So, this chapter is dedicated to Alexander, the first person Ive ever fallen in love with. I hope, maybe one day I'll find him again. 

Maybe I'll go to the UK sometime in the future to look for him, right now, thats the only plan I got besides sit and wait for him to add me, message me or ask me a question with some new account.

Goodbye,

Jess