Lies & Fake Apologies

I Still Miss You

A/N: I looked back at this story after I got a couple of  votes on it and it's so cringeworthy I have to write more to ruin my life even more by reading this months after. This story is complete shit I wouldn't read this unless you are into a depressed girl whining about her life all the time while crying and eating chocolate in a dark lonely room. Not judging you though, read away, this is trash I'm trash we're all trash don't judge me. Also this is a chapter about a different person than the last two chapters just clarifying that. 

You used to be one of my best friends. We used to sit at lunch and laugh over our totally inappropriate jokes and listen to MCR. You used to help me with my problems, you and him used to tell me it would be okay and say you cared about me. 

But that all started to change, you had been forced to do online school, and you left forever. I gave you a rock I painted on a few days before at a Indian powwow. It was something I made in less than 5 minutes and all it really had was a big "J" on it and a little flower. But I didn't have much and I thought you could remember me by looking at it. 

We were pretty good friends still and I texted you everyday, it definitely wasn't the same as in person but I was glad to still have you. 

But one day I got a message from one of your "friends" saying how I was such an awful friend and how I apparently I was trying to "steal your boyfriend" ( who btw, is also the guy in the last two chapters.) I cried, I cried for hours straight and I couldn't seem to stop. I was losing you again. I tried hard to believe you didn't mean it, she was lying, she had to be. But then you did something, something that left me shocked. 

You said that I apparently tried to cyberbully you on Twitter when I didn't even have one, you tried  to turn him against me, you tried to turn my only source of light left away from me. You just went and dumped him, saying it was all my fault. 

But I still don't hate you, I probably should, but I don't. I'm not even that angry or disappointed. I want you back, the old you, the one that used to be my friend. The one that cared. You played such a big part of my life. You practically saved me. I wish I could forget all of the good times we had, so I could hate you. I want to hate you. 'Cause even after all of the pain you put me through, I still miss you. I'm angry at what you did, but I still miss you, I still need you. Or at least the person that I used to know.

But before the you I used to know is gone forever,

I only have one last question for you. 

Do you still remember, all the good times we had? All the good times we could of had?

Do you still have the rock I gave you so many months ago? 

Or is that gone too, just like the person that I once loved and couldn't live without?