Love You To Death [Kyungsoo]

|| Introduction || Unhealed Damage

  ~Flashback~   

April/24/2006 

Hangyang Park

"It's been awhile.. I guess.. well since last week.." Kyungsoo quietly murmurs before cracking a small smile that quickly dissipates. Then stands silence

Everything is still and he likes it in a way, He can clearly hear his thoughts, And it feels as if he's the only person in the world, It's eerily quiet, hold for bird's chipping here and there. 

The sun is rising and feels warm on his skin, As it drenches him in rays between thin tree branches that are slowly gaining back their green leaves, Dirt surrounding his feet, And the sky different hues of yellows, oranges, and pinks that were originally faded red, He's never been this early..

Kyungsoo decided sneaking off because he's not allowed alone.. He was supposed to be patient, and visit much later with his family, Who are still asleep in this 6:25am hour, He has to get back soon.

He needs this he thinks.., Just him... alone, But can't help but feel if it's selfish of him..He never dreads it, It's just.. the day always makes it harder.

His doe and somewhat still tired eyes began to water and fill with tears.. He had no control over, yet he didn't let them fall, He has an important reason for visiting so soon again, And he doesn't want to ruin it by letting his emotions get the best of him even this early.

A calm Breeze hitting his now damp lashes, making him shiver slightly and cling to his grey cardigan.

Kyungsoo's begun to even out the happier visits with his aching ones, Most times he let's silence enclose him, And listens to the calm April breeze of spring.. He doesn't plan on crying and wants to hold strong, Not only when others are around but alone as well. So he blinks back tears, swallows the lump in his throat and inhales deeply.. to say

'Happy Birthday Daddy....' His celebratory tone trailing off.

Glancing at the object at his feet, Only scheming over the lettering he's read countless times now.

D.O Hyunsoo - 1972 - 2001 Beloved Husband Father And Son.

And as the words leave his lips, He's hit with the realization of another passing year without he and his brother's beloved father.. It's been five years already? But today he's managed to be in his calmest state.

During Kyungsoo's visits, he laughs and talks about his day, Other times he's quietly sobbing so hard and uncontrollably that his throat utterly burns from forcing the sounds from escaping, And his eyes stay red and puffy the whole day..

Most day's he's okay.., then would cry everything out soundly later.

But out of all the ways he spends his visits, he always lay's down.

He even sleeps.., it was accidental the first time, Now ever since then he's felt closest to him that way.

He can't explain why he feels so calm at a graveyard, Other than what he thinks is his dad's presence..

It's as if a wave of content hits him, His heart slows.., Breaths steady..

Senses awakened yet groggy, And the burial ground feels as if it's the most comfortable place he's ever slept, He feels abnormally at peace..

Kyungsoo tells his father everything, He doesn't even talk this much with friends, Beaming even at times, Yet in the end he's still always left with a gaping hole in his heart, that'll never fully heal.., 

He has his mom, his headstrong older brother and he also has his best friend park chanyeol. 

And they're more than enough to keep fighting to live for. Except he deals with a internal truth that not only hurts him but stays with him everyday. He still wanders in grief at times as if it happened yesterday..

He doesn't get why he's here. It was supposed to be him in the ground..,

He guesses it's why he feels this weird peacefulness.. His family knows his pain, Difference is.. what he bare witnessed to and experienced has left him broken for an unforeseeable future..

His father's death and even his own...

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A/N: Please lend your thoughts comments and votes!!