Lobsters (LONG VERSION)

1

The day had not been going well for me.

I walked into History class after: a) nearly being run over by a car because I may or may not have been crying in the street because of some of the other things that will be listed here but instead got wet because the car drove through a puddle like a fucking idiot I mean what is that even, b) my favorite flower shop in town closed because apparently there is no God and if there is one He really enjoys making me cry like a very small child because I miss my flowers, c) I got broken up with, d) I'm not entirely sure but I met a girl who was possibly, no most definitely, the prettiest girl I've ever seen in my life and that has thrown me into a private turmoil because e) I think I may be a lesbian.

Maybe I should go over that last part again.

Chris and I were out on possibly the most horrifyingly-awkward date that man has ever created. I had off-handedly mentioned to Chris that I was Italian when he asked me where the name Mia came from, and I guess that stuck in his brain because he took me to the local Olive Garden. I guess it was charming in its own little way, a really nervous guy taking a shy girl to a run-down restaurant in a strip mall between a Sharper Image and a Dollar General, but I'm not partial to unsalted, microwaved pasta, which is the Olive Garden specialty.

We didn't sit in the same booth, which was my first subtle hint to him that this really wasn't going to work out. It wasn't that Chris wasn't nice; he was, almost irritatingly so. He always called me beautiful and tried to hold my hand, which is really what bugged me the most, I guess. He never really seemed to care when I told him about all the things I really cared about, like how fucking awesome dogs are or how when I was nine years old I made a button with Paula Deen's face on it. He didn't care about that, and in my mind that basically made him Hitler.

But, for some reason, I still wanted it to work out. Chris was my last dying hope of me being totally "normal," and if I dated Chris I could finally lay to rest a mental battle that had raging in my head for a few years ever since I first found myself vaguely attracted to a girl in my freshman high school class. If I dated Chris, that voice would just shut the fuck up for a second and let me think for myself, and it would be a much less stressful time for me and I could focus on the important things in life like Cupcake Wars and wondering how exactly people don't explode when they enter space. Important things.

When we were walking back he tried to hold my hand and I shook my head no and then shoved my hand in my pockets. It didn't really end abruptly or in any grand way; we just both knew by the time that we got back to school that we wouldn't going on another lunch date, or any date at all. It just wasn't going to work.

Then the tears started flowing, right in the parking lot of the school. He had darted away by that time, I could tell he was embarrassed. I started sobbing because I was probably fucking gay why else would I not find him attractive at all, and also where are all the puppies, where did they go, I really wish I could go to that flower shop right now, God damn it.

I walked back into class slowly, wiping my eyes. I got onto the sidewalk and was starting to walk back into the main buildings of the school when that motherfucker soaked me in water by driving like a dumbass. Then I started crying again, and then I opened the door to my World History class, and then everyone was staring at me, and then I smashed my head down on the desk and had no intention of ever raising it again ever.

Class went by quickly. I heard something about a project and my name announced and then a girl named Polly announced shortly afterward and then the bell ringing and I still wasn't moving. I felt a really soft hand gently tapping the back of my neck, and the cutest voice I'd ever heard whispering "Hey, are you okay?" Her voice was comforting, and soft, and sweet.

I turned around to say hello and was greeted with the most beautiful blue eyes I'd ever seen my life. Big, and bright, and they looked like they were smiling even if her mouth wasn't. Happy and excited and loving, those kinds of eyes.

"You okay?" She bit her lip softly, trying not to touch me too much. "I uh, I kinda noticed you were gone today. I hope that's not creepy? I just think you're really..." Her face grew red and she caught herself. "Anyway. I noticed you were gone and I took notes for you, and I made sure we were partners so you weren't paired up with a weirdo. There are weirdos in here, you know? Not me, though. But there are people in here that don't like dogs and it's fucking shameful."

She actually made me smile, and I got up and grabbed my bag while she hurriedly tore the notes out of her notebook and scrawled down a number on one of the sheets.

"If you have questions or something, just text me he-"

"Do you want to get lunch tomorrow, maybe?"

The words just came out of my mouth. She smiled and stared at the ground.

"Oh! I uh, yeah. Yeah! That would be great. That sounds fun, yeah. We can talk about the project and stuff."

"Yeah, sounds good. What's your name, again?"

"Oh, I'm Polly."

"Right, right. Sorry." I grabbed my bag and nearly walked out, but I turned around again and saw her smiling as I walked away. I looked at her shirt, a brilliant yellow, and decided to go with my gut and take my chances and go even further down the rabbit hole. "I really like your shirt. You look pretty today. Just thought you should know."

Her face went a deep red and she smiled at me. "Oh, thanks. It um... It reminds me of daisies. Because, y'know, yellow and everything. I really like flowers, so I always like wearing this shirt. I used to wear it only on Wednesdays, when I'd go to that flower shop, but it closed. There is no justice in this world anymore, you know?"

I started walking out the door to hide my smile. "Yeah, I know. See you tomorrow."