How to Kill a Phoenix

6: OF GUILDS AND GIRLS

CHAPTER 6: OF GUILDS AND GIRLS

"The beginnings and ends of shadow lie between the light and darkness and may be infinitely diminished and infinitely increased. Shadow is the means by which bodies display their form. The forms of bodies could not be understood in detail but for shadow." – Leonardo da Vinci

*

Even as the group walked silently along the endless jetty, passing lamppost after lamppost, Emily was already regretting her last statement.

It was too early to be that optimistic, and to judge whether she'll like a place by its scenery was a logical fallacy. It also didn't take much for her to realize that she was being too emotional.

Then, with a sinking feeling, she realized that, back at home, every time her emotions spun out of control, she had Katrina.

She couldn't help snickering bitterly.

"What is it?" Rachel asked.

Get out of my way, Milly.

"Nothing," she intoned, not slowing down her steps. Justifications crept.

She's really only going to be a hassle; this sounds like a dangerous journey and she looks like the only one who doesn't have any special abilities. Her presence is also counterproductive for my personal growth. It's hard to grow stronger with a doting maid.

'I want to be strong like Papa. He never got any friends, yet he never cries.'

Shut up.

You could've always told her earlier that she's not going.

She wouldn't let me!

You chose to disgrace her instead.

What's done is done. First thing to do when I get back: find Katrina even if she's gone to Timbuktu.

Yeah, one year of guilt, well done, Emily.

I said, get out of my way, Milly.

A glowing jellyfish alighted on her nose, the brightness almost blinding her. She flicked it away, only ending up squashing it with the palm of her hand. She jumped. "Ow, hot!" Luckily, it wasn't flaming hot; it only stung like a drop of water just a few degrees below boiling point.

Her cap fell on the ground. She stopped to pick it up, taking a good look at it. It is I, your Fuhrer.

"Emily?" Rachel asked, stopping ahead of her. The rest of the group kept on walking: Rain with his steady pace; Tanya with her silent, fluid steps; and Fox with his long strides.

Emily held out her cap, smiling.

"Rachel, I declare this to be my badass cap! I'll wear it whenever badassery is needed. Just now, I have disgraced this cap by acting like a wuss. It shall not happen again."

Rachel responded with a slow nod, her brown eyes wide.

"And this," Emily pinched the front of her trench coat, "is my badass coat. Wearing it or the cap means I'm honor-bound to act according to the badass code. Wearing both means double the obligation."

"That beats lucky underwear," Rachel muttered, grinning.

"Well," Emily added an afterthought, "I understand fully that they're not magical. But!" she resumed her dramatic tone. "Whether I win or I crash; even if in the end I were to die and my corpse disemboweled; even if in the end a thousand monsters were to ravage my soulless body, I will meet the end with badassery that befits the main character of an epic story.