the other side of him (Harry)

chapter 3

taryns pov* 

dinner last night was amazing. but i havent eaten that much in forever i think i might throw up now. oh great. great i just threw up! ugh. i was hoping to actually eat that one time and not throw up. i dont want to tell anyone about my eating disorders. fuck. why did i eat so much. im an idiot! where are my razors? i zipped open my suitcase and brought up the bottom and there they wore. i took out the small makeupbag and took it in the bathroom with me. i stepped in the bathroom and turned on the water. i didnt want anyone to hear my whines plus its easy clean up. 

i looked at my thighs. all the fresh cuts from yesterday. here we go again. i took my smallest razor and slowy glided it across my leg watching as the blood came trickling out. i didnt feel it enough i grabbed a different razor. a new one, sharper. no blood on it yet. well thats about to change. i slid it fast across my leg before i new it i was screaming and crying. fuck that was too deep so much blood was coming out! ahhhh omfg. then i heard someone runnning up the stairs fuck. crap. shit. this isnt good i tried to hide my razors it wasnt working i was naked in the bathtub. crap. there was knocking at the door. 

"TARYN ARE YOU OKAY" harry asked super worried. 

i was still crying. "yeeeeahhhh" i said stuttering and crying. 

"im coming in!" before i could say anything there he was staring at my discuting naked body and a bathtub full of bloody water and all my cuts. shit. 

"harry" i said trying not to burst into tears.

"taryn why would you do this youre so beautiful, just the way you are." he said starting to cry. 

he walked over to me and picked me up and grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my legs. oh shit i forgot im still naked. at least he wasnt a creepo and staring at me and shit. 

he set me down on the toilet  and handed me my robe to put around me. he started cleaning my cuts.

"harry, can you please not tell the lads. or actually anyone?" i asked harry  really scared that he would.

"i promise... but on one condition" he looked up at my face, i nodded. 

"you tell me why you would do this to yourself." shit. this is what i did NOT want to happen. UGH. okay well i guess ill tell him i mean i trust him. i think... 

"i started when i was 12, on my 12th birthday, 8 years, well almost 9 years ago. my brother is exactly 1 year older than me we were both born on september 26th. my mother is abusive and likes to do things her way. for my brothers 13th birthday and my 12th, my mother decieded she was going to give us a "wonderful gift" she took us into her room and told me to turn around. she grabbed my brother and taped his mouth i turned around and saw, she did the same to me. she threw me onto her bed and took off my dress leaving me in my underwear and bra. she took off my brothers shirt and shorts. leaving him in his boxers. she threw my brother on the bed too. she also got undressed.. all the way... she jumped on top off us and told us to undress all the way  or she would kill us. we did as we were told. she got off us and grabbed something out of her drawer... a condom. she put it on my brother and forced him to sit on top of me. at this point i was handcuffed to her bed my hands above me. she whispered something in my brothers ear. he looked at me and said "im so sorry tay"  and leaned over and started making out with me. after what seemed like forever he stopped my mom grabbed his dick and shoved it in me. moving him up and down up and down. it felt good but i knew it was so wrong. pretty soon my vagina was letting out some wet stuff i didnt know what it was then but my mom whispered in his ear again he started crying again and scooted down and bent down and all of a sudden my dad walked in. saving us he looked at my mom and started screaming at her my brother quickly got off of me and took the tape off his mouth and took the tape off me he helped me get the handcuffs off and we ran out of the room we quickly threw something on and i ran to him bursting is tears i feel asleep in his arms. i woke up around 8pm still in his arms i went into the bathroom and  started crying again. i thought it was my fault i needed something to relieve that pain i looked around. i found just what i needed my razor. i had it wasnt much but it was something i started swiping it across my leg again and again and i  fell  asleep. ive been cutting ever since then.... almost being 21...." when i finished i realized i was crying.. and so was harry but he looked shocked too. i looked down at my leg that was fully bandaged. 

"taryn" he said starting to pick me up. 

"you dont realize how sorry i am, you shouldnt have had to go thru that." i was still crying he brought me to my bed and layed me down he layed next to me.  

"thanks harry." i said trying to stop my crying. he was spooning me now. i feel asleep. and when i woke up there he was still next to me. oh god i like him alot. if only he knew.

harrys pov*

she had fallen asleep in my arms i fell asleep crying. i cant believe that happened and how she trusted me enough to tell me. shes so beautiful and amazing and kindhearted... im falling for her... hard. i have so many questions but i dont to bother her about it. she'll probably tell me another time.

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sorry i know thats a lot to take in but it had to be done!