The Way We Are - Larry Stylinson AU

II

--MATURE--

Word count: 5301

Pairing: Louis/Harry

*

It's been quite the struggle for Harry, from the moment he found his way to the clinic, it's all been a blur he'd rather forget, certain memories sticking to his mind and miserably playing on repeat. If you haven't ever hurt yourself it might be hard to realize the pain that goes into the whole procedure, the anxiety and then the shame that fills you once you're finished, when there's an angry scar resting on your skin rather than just pale nothing. Harry knows exactly how that feels, knows how it tears you apart.

Louis seems to understand too, seems to get what the others don't. "Just stop.", some will tell him, like it wasn't already struggle, as if he did these things because he legitimately wanted to. It's the need to do it, and not the want. And Louis gets that. Gets that Harry can't shave alone, understands that he'll need supervision and people checking his room every week for sharp objects. Louis doesn't ask him too much about it, he'll just shrug or smile or maybe even both and then he'll whisper something lame and adorable into Harry's ear and Harry will sigh to himself with relief because Louis doesn't throw twenty questions at him like everyone else would.

Why can't you shave alone Harry? You can't control yourself for a second, can you?

Why don't you just stop with this ridiculous behavior already?

You know they'll leave the ugliest of scars later, right honey?

And Harry doesn't like questions he can't handle, doesn't like the judging looks he'll earn when answering them. He knows he's stupid sometimes already, thanks. He doesn't need everyone else telling him so. Maybe Louis is allowed to though, because he'll always say it in a joking manner and then he'll peck Harry's nose sweetly. "You're such an idiot some times, you know that Harry?" He'll whisper in his ear and Harry won't mind it at all actually. In fact, Harry figures Louis has helped him, even if it being a little. Louis makes his thoughts drift of to him rather than to the wounds on his hips, makes him wonder what Louis is up to rather than about the trauma at home. And it's kind of nice for a change.

*

Louis is making progress. It's vaguely small, and his doctor tells him there's still a lot left to go, but if he continues like this, actually trying -and sometimes succeeding- on eating all his daily meals, and following his light exercise program (Which Louis had insisted on.), he might be able to leave in, like, four months or maybe five, which still is a long time. But it's better than eight, Louis thinks.

And Harry is so proud of Louis, it's close to being actually hilarious mixed with unhealthily hot the way he hugs him and kisses him -it's become a thing now, thank god- and then whispers all kind of encouraging and sweet words into his ear, like, "I'm so bloody proud of you Lou", or, "Babe, you've been so fucking good, I just - wow."

The cursing just adds up to the hotness of his words, Louis figures. And it shouldn't really work for him in that way but it /so/ does.

*

It's eight in the morning on a Thursday, so in other words; Breakfast. The meal Louis like the most as he can eat in the company of his friends, rather than having his Body Lovers group -yes, that is sadly still a thing- all accompany him. Apparently eating in groups are supposed to be good, but it just sets off the mood, Louis reasons, and he'd rather have his food with Harry and Niall anyways.

As any other morning, Louis and Harry sitting next to a possibly staving Niall, or so one would think immediately at the amount of sandwiches that enters his mouth while laughing at some joke neither Harry or Louis ever gets.