The urge came after AP chemistry.
The desire came after I hid and cried
Erica Samuels pushed me over the edge
Her words helped me decide to pick up a blade
Blaire and I were leaving chemistry class, that's when Erica came.
Let's go into detail about Erica Samuels
She's a living Barbie doll
Silicone body,bright blonde hair, and makeup slathered on her face. To put it into basic terms she's the mean girl if the school. She's THE Regina George from mean girls. So she's clearly going to pick on the schools emo chick. She came behind me and pulled my dyed hair. My scalp burning. She pushed me into a locker. My arm bruised. She called me an attention whore. She said I only acted broken, dressed in black to get pity. Then she kicked me in the gut. Both physically and emotionally. Blaine tried to stop the whole show. The exposition of the school freak. She was stopped by Erica's entourage, forced to watch her friend be ripped apart. Then they walked away. Leaving me and Blaire broken on the school floors. Left like nothing happened. Like they did nothing. I was nothing. Thank god that was the last class of the day. I got up and ran. Ran all the way outside. Ran all the way home. Ran all the way to my bathroom. Ran to the blade.
I was terrified.
I HAD TO TRY IT
I HAD TO FEEL SOMETHING
I didn't want to believe
Believe I was nothing
But I did
So I cut
To make sure I wasn't nothing and that I could feel
I bled, and bled, and bled. I thought I could just find some joy. Yet all i felt was...nothing. The thick red liquid continued to pour from my wrist...the pain from the knife was searing through my conscience. But all I could do was stare
It wasn't that bad. The blood wasn't too thick
The blood wasn't pouring. It was only dripping. I like to that day my baby step phase
Because I wasn't cutting uncontrollably
I wasn't cutting unconsciously
I didn't feels as horrible as I do now
Well as much as I did at least
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YYOOOOOOO I'm on a rooooollll
2 chapters in one night!! (Even if they are short)
Hope you enjoy 😘😘
YOU ARE READING
Where can I find my own?
RandomI bled, and bled, and bled. I thought I could just find some joy. Yet all i felt was...nothing. The thick red liquid continued to poor from my wrist...the pain from the knife was searing through my conscience. But all I could do was stare Rebecca ju...
