After Dean had finally sealed his love for his newlywed wife, Jo, he caught a glimpse out of the corner of his eye of two figures standing up on the hill that encased the small valley where the ceremony was being held. After the crowed whooed and yelped, Dean took a clearer look at the two men. One of them looked familiar. And it was the same man that had kissed him all that time ago in the hospital when he woke up.
Dean wasn't going to admit it, but he rather liked it when he did. Alas, he had a new start. He was just married to a beautiful woman, and he wasn't going to let a small flutter of the heart screw that up.
So he pushed those feelings down- deep down. And smiled, moving around the guests.
By the time the party started dying down, he left with Jo and on the way up to the suite, he closed his eyes briefly.
And something sparked.
A flash of these vibrant blue eyes.
Something sparked.
And he remembered him. Everything. The way Cas made him feel when he slept next to him, he remembered the way he kissed him in the back of his car,he remembered the lake, he remembered when he was going to go home to propose to him. He had fallen in love with Cadillac all over again.
Jo must've noticed Dean acting strange, so she jerked him out of his thoughts by looping her skinny little arms around her new husbands waist.
"Dean, honey... what's wrong?" She purred.
Dean looked up at her with guilt and confusion.
"This is all wrong... I'm sorry. I need to go find Cas and tell him I love him. Did you see him? He looked so thin..."
"Excuse me? Him? Are you telling me you're in love with another man, because if that's so-" Dean cut her off with a kiss on the cheek.
"Yes, Jo! I'm sorry! I just need to find Cas!" He raced out and climbed into the impala, and whipped out his phone to text his brother.
'To Sam:
SAMMY!!! I REMEMBER. PLZ TELL ME YOU KEPT TABS ON. CAS!! WHERE IS HE???'
Dean anxiously waited, fingers drumming on his steering wheel.
He was going to get Cas back.
He was going to hug him and kids him and tell him he's sorry. And they'd get married and be together forever. Adrenaline pulsated through his veins.
He was soon interrupted by his thoughts by a beep from his phone.
'From Sam:
Grandbury street, apartment 221 C. If he's not there, his neighbors usually poke around over there. You can ask them.'
Dean didn't bother replying, but rather raced over to the address. It wasn't too far.
He hopped out of the car, ran up the stairs and vigorously rapped on the door.
No answer.
He ran back and climbed up the fire escape. This window had to to be his place. He climbed in.
There was a picture Dean had taken of the two of them set on the mantel.
"CAS, BABY! WHERE ARE YOU?! I REMEMBER! I REMEMBER EVERYTHING!"
Just then he saw a folded up piece of paper lying on the table.
"Cas...?"
He walked over to it, picked it up and began to read.
"A length of rope I ought to to hang myself w-wi-..." the last words dribbled out of his mouth as his eyes clouded with the tears he wiped from his face with the back of his wrist.
"N-no!" He frantically rushed around the cramped little area, coming across a small closet, opening it and stopping abruptly. He choked out a yelp.
He carefully removed Castiel from his make-shift collar and laid him gently on the floor. He was bent over him, holding him. He kissed him and smothered his lifeless body with apologies and a salty wetness that seeped from his eyes as he carded his fingers through his soft, dark hair. He kissed him so many times, hoping to God that true loves kiss would bring him back as it did in all the stories.
But this was reality. And this was no story.
"Oh, Castiel..." He whimpered. "I'm so sorry, baby. I'm so sorry I didn't remember you. I'm so sorry. I know how much it must've hurt when I pushed you off- Oh Castiel..." Dean was sobbing, cradling Cas' body close to his own as he racked his body with the pathetic sobs where you cannot breathe and your jaw hangs loose as you squeak there, gasping for air.
"CASTIEL, DAMN IT! YOU DON'T OF A BITCH!" He screamed in one last attempt to wake him.
A shadow emerged from the doorway behind him as he whipped his head around to learn who the clapping belonged to.
Michael.
"Wow... do you know how amusingly pathetic that looked? I mean, really? Did you really think that after all that happend he'd just sit around and wait for you?" He barked out a cold, dry laugh that was filled with bitterness and venom. "I mean, honestly, Dean. I knew you wouldn't remember in time to save him, but did you really he'd be alive?!" He sneered, angry and possibly on the verge of tears.
Dean slowly stood up, carefully placing Castiel on his bed, before trudging over to glare at Micheal dead in the eye. He was intimidating.
"If you..." He searched for words "If you were HALF the man Castiel was-" Dean didn't get to finish his sentence before Micheal had him pinned up against the wall by his suit jacket lapels and started to shout at the Winchester.
"IF I WAS HALF THE MAN WAS- WHAT?! TELL ME, DEAN. WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE? YOU DON'T THINK I TRIED TO HELP MY BROTHER EVEN THOUGH OUR FAMILY DISOWNED HIM AND WAS UNHAPPY WITH HIM AND WAS UNHAPPY WITH HIS DECISIONS DOESN'T MEAN I LOVED HIM ANY LESS!SO GO AHEAD, DEAN. GO AHEAD AND TELL ME I DIDN'T LOVE MY BROTHER!" Micheal cried. Tears streamed down his face as he dropped Dean from the wall and hobbled over to sit by his brother, shaken.
"I'm... going to go now..." Dean stated, his voice cracking.
Micheal remained silent and stayed there sitting like a statue next to Castiel, grasping his hand.
"Ya know, Micheal... he did love you, too. Some days I'd come home and find him crying about how much he missed you... and Gabriel, your opinions aside..."
Dean shuffled out of Castiel apartment. He went out to his car, and drove.
He drove out to that same lake.
Ready to die, he walked out to it.
"Cas, you aren't taking this journey alone."
End
