So this is the story of what's going on in my life right now
There are girls that are talking about me it started with just 2 Nalynn and Victoria bow its a bunch Maci Rayan Neavah that's just the ones I know about I don't know why they are talking about me calling me a hoe and a thot but it's really bothering me I feel like no one even cares about me and corralyne I know I promised I wouldn't cut but when all these people are talking about me and calling me names and talking about jumping me I can't help it thinking about it so I cut my self to think about the pain instead of the words...... But my life is fucked up because Nalynn is all like your mad at me well hell yeah your talking about me like today I was standing on the steps and she was like "Vanessa do you think your fake" I looked at my friend Hannah and said "No" and she said "oh just asking cuz everyone here thinks you are" like what the fuck what I wanted to do is say you know what yes I am fake because I act like I'm happy and laughing around all of you but the reality of it is I'm cutting myself every single night because of it and make them feel bad but I didn't because I don't like people knowing it bothers me when people feel compelled to feel bad for me in the last chapter I put I wish Lorenzio would just say baby don't cut but not to be forced I want him to say it because he really wants me to stop really I feel like he doesn't even care about me but that's okay because apparently I'm desperate because I'm dating him not because I love him not because I actually fell for him but because I think I'm cool.....Nalynn told me that some one is saying that I am only dating him cuz I think I'm cool I have never been cool in my life always been bullied that's why when my friends are trying to cheer me up by talking about all the girls who are talking about me I don't say anything because I don't like when they do that to me and this guy Jermey is saying I'm desperate because apparently Lorenzio goes to Clyde every weekend and cheats like no because you don't even know him so I'm just done I said it at lunch in the gym I'm done dealing with the shit corralyne I'm so sorry I broke my promise and I can't promise that I'm not going to do it anymore because with all the shit that's going on in my life I'm going to do that so I am really sorry and I hope you are not mad at me anymore
