A Game of Jax

Chapter Twenty-Six

"Audree," Jax said softly, walking into the dorm, "baby, you need to eat."

I shook my head. I was cramped into the corner of the bed, my back pressed against the wall. I hadn't left the room since I came home a couple days ago.

Jax sat on the bed next to me, gently placing his hand on my knee, "At least come out to bar with me. You haven't seen Sid in days. He misses you."

I blinked back tears, shaking my head, "I can't Jax. How can I look at him? I'm a mom, I'm supposed to protect my son and I can't even protect myself. I don't deserve to be a mom!"

"That's not true. You're the best mom I know. He keeps asking for you, I think Mom is starting to annoy him." Jax cracked a small smile at that, hoping I would join him. I shook my head again.

Jax sighed, "Audree, you can be weak. That's fine because I know, and you know, that's not true. But if you want to be, then I'll be strong for both of us."

I didn't respond.

"Please just come out for a little bit. Okay?"

"Will you be with me?" I asked softly.

He nodded, taking my hand and helping me out of the bed, "I won't leave you again."

I walked out of the dorms, Jax's arm slung around my shoulders. I could hear the loudness of everyone hanging out and drinking like their usual afternoon ritual. When Jax and I walked out of the hallway and into the main room, it seemed like all eyes were on us. The room fell silent and I felt super self conscious. I stepped closer to Jax.

He kissed the side of my head gently. "It's alright," he whispered, guiding me to the bar. I took a seat between Clay and Opie.

"Can I get you something?" Half Sack asked.

"Just a water please." He nodded, quickly filling a cup with the tap and placing it in front of me.

No one said anything, the silence being broken only by the pool game that was coming from behind me.

"We missed you," Opie said, leaning closer to me.

I nodded, "Thanks."

"How are you feeling?" He and every one else had been asking me that whenever they saw me.

I shrugged, "Sick of people asking me."

"Well we hardly see you anymore."

"I'm just not feeling being around people right now," I said softly. I took a shakey breath, trying not to cry, which seemed to be something I had been doing a lot lately, "I just feel so broken."

Opie put a reassuring hand on my knee, rubbing it gently with his thumb, "I know. But we're all here for you."

The next day I tried to pull myself out of the room. I actually got into the shower for the first time in days and put on clean clothes. Gemma had texted me earlier that day that she would be bringing Sid to the shop while she was working, if I felt up to visiting.

I headed through the clubhouse and out through the garage.

"Hey darlin," Jax called out to me as I walked past a bike he was working on. I gave him a small wave, ducking into Gemma's office.

"Mommy!" Sid cheered, running over to me. I scooped him up, hugging him tightly.

"Hey baby boy. I missed you," I said, tucking his long blonde hair behind his ear.

"Where were you mommy?" he asked me, pulling at my necklace.

"I was just a little sick is all. But I feel a little better now."