Love Routine

Last Attempt

*Naila's P.O.V*

My last attempt at suicide was crazy , I mean I did it as a desperate exit and cry for the slightest bit of attention from anyone , be it my parents , friends & boyfriend.

I remember my thoughts running wild mauling and craving every bit of salvation off my despair , I had made so many mistakes and the after voices began to slowly consume me . So I did what a normal person would do well with a tinge of mental instability , I took a scarf a yellow mustard fluffy scarf. It's funny how I carefully remember how it looked , I tied it around my neck slowly tightening it while staring at the mirror "will they miss me ? ".

I ran into the bathroom tied the scarf around the highest bar on the grill of my window , prayed for mercy and latched onto it with my all . Five minutes of desperate air gasping and wild thoughts didn't seem to do the trick . I guess God didn't want me to leave as well , tears cascaded down my cheeks I prayed for an escape but I was a coward even at the mere stare that death seemed to give me.

Mum called my name severally , even after the bullying she didn't seem bothered by it as much she couldn't tell that I was trying to mask it all . She probably even didn't know the pain that ran through me.

It was the last attempt I ever made , I'm yet to make another soon with all these emotions that seem to carry me around whilst bedazzling me with episodes of depression & suicide attempts.

My mind still ran wild , I needed some escape route off this trouble.

Writers note
I'm really trying to make this as interesting as possible , this book is dear to my heart and It's based on a true story.

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Wanjiru Muchiri 💋