MaNan FF - HEAVEN (On hold)

- 18 -

Note: Plug in your earphones and get into the mood! :) 

An uneasy smile played on Manik's lips as he shrugged and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. It was painful to watch the train disappear into the distance. Painful... as though a part of him had broken. As though he had lost a precious something forever.

Being aware of his own fake smile intensified the horrible ache in his chest and eyes. What is it with you Manik? You had prepared for this since ages. You had long back braced yourself for that separation. For that forever goodbye. So why's it this little farewell... this one-week separation affects you?

Manik blinked and felt a tear escape his eye. He quickly flicked it away and glanced around in embarrassment, wondering if anyone caught him crying. Truth was that he had lived his life believing that he was prepared to let her go. Was he however? The inconsolable pain questioned his beliefs. If this is what I feel... then what about Nandini? This whole thing must be killing her!

He pulled out his cell phone in a hurry. I need to find out... make sure that she is okay.

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Nandini struggled to keep herself in check. Try as she may, there was no stopping the tears now. It continued to cascade like a waterfall and all she could do was bite onto her trembling lips to ease herself up. She had prayed that this moment would never come. Because she had feared this separation for ages. It had haunted her for several nights. Sure. This was just for a week. But she had this feeling that it would be forever. What if this single week changed everything forever? 

She blinked the tears away and hastily straightened up her contorted features as a white hanky came into focus. "You guys are pretty attached, aren't you?" It was Aryaman. He smiled warmly and urged her to find some comfort in his handkerchief.

They were at their respective seats now. She could sense her fellow passengers eyeing her and this made her go redder in the face. To make it worse, Aryaman's question did nothing to make her feel better. It only made her want to cry more.

"Excuse me," she mumbled weakly and rose to her feet.

Aryaman had no clue on how to handle this sticky situation. He wished that there was some way to make her feel better. But all what he could do was just stare at her with an uncomfortable churning in his gut.

"I'll be right back. Just need to be alone for a while." Nandini justified herself. She still hadn't accepted his offer to comfort her.

"Sure," Aryaman responded immediately. "I completely understand. Just give me a shout if you need me." Though he was smiling, he felt uneasy as Nandini made a quick exit.

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Manik wrung his phone with his sweaty hands. He had almost dialled her number before but stopped himself from doing so. No. Don't call her. If you keep running after her then she'll never get used to all this separation and stuff. Let her get used to it. She HAS to. It's for her own good. Sure... she's going to cry and be upset and all that. But at some point, she's got to stop. She'll learn that she has to move on. And she will! Once she finds her man, she'll never even need to think about me. Hell! She won't even remember me. This pain isn't forever. Even this shall pass.

The loud ringing of his phone startled him out of his distressing thoughts. It was Nandini. The very sight of her name made him breathless and brought an exhilarated smile to his face. He jumped in to answer her call but paused with a sharp clench in his chest as life's lessons came flooding back to his mind once again. No. Don't answer it. She's just calling you because she misses you. You know her! That's why she's calling. But what if something's wrong...? His thumb danced over the answer and reject buttons as conflicting thoughts eroded his mind. No! He silences her call with a sharp swipe and takes a deep breath. She's perfectly alright, he convinced himself, don't worry. She knows how to take care of herself.

In spite of all these assurances, something kept pricking at the back of his mind. A part of him was screaming to talk to her. He wanted to be cent percent sure that she was okay.

His phone rang again. And again! AND AGAIN! But he continued to ignore her calls. She'll think that I'm busy and finally settle down. Yes. Ignore her. Let her calm down. She will. You just need to let her. The more you try to let her lean onto you, the more you would be screwing up her life. So chill brother. Give her a break. She needs it. To find herself. To find what and whom she really wants in life.

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Nandini stood at the open door with great distress. The breeze slapped onto her face and ruffled her hair as the train sped along the tracks at neck breaking speed. Have you slept already? Wish I could talk to you. Missing you like crazy my friend. She messaged him and straightened up. There were passengers and vendors walking up and down the aisles.

"Hey..." a voice from over her shoulder startled her. She swerved around to find... Aryaman. "Whoa! Chill!" He held up his hands to calm her down. "Sorry. I just came to check in on you. You'd been away for a while so just wanted to make sure that everything was okay."

Nandini smiled weakly. His abrupt presence did creep her out but she was touched at his concern.

"I suggest that we should return to our seats," Aryaman almost shouted over the loud clatter of the wheels on the tracks. "If that's okay with you," he added. "It isn't too safe at the door. In a lot many ways." He shot a threatening look at a person standing at the opposite doorway. He had been watching Nandini for a very long time and she wasn't even aware of it.

Nandini nodded and headed back in. Aryaman followed suit and helped her settle down.

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By 10 PM, most of the passengers had tucked in to sleep and the aisles were almost dark. Aryaman and Nandini had occupied the middle berths. "Ever travelled in a train before?" asked Aryaman with an amused smile.

"Yeah, couple of times," replied Nandini quietly and fondly recollected a trip they had from school. Manik was there too and it was loads of fun, as always.

"Me too," he said rather contentedly. "You see... I actually prefer the upper berth. I kind of love to sleep through my journey and you know... the lower or middle berths don't actually give you that freedom."

Freedom... Nandini smiled as she recollected her last train trip with Manik. "Manik likes the upper berth too," she said fondly and dwelled into some pleasant memories. "The last train trip we went on... the poor guy got the middle berth. Problem is... he's too tall and half of his legs were sticking out of the berth. Everything was fine until an aunty got up at night to go to the bathroom and went smack into his legs."

The both of them were giggling now. "That's quite messy!" chuckled Aryaman.

"Tell me about it," laughed Nandini. "You should have heard the kind of garbage that spilled out of her mouth."

Aryaman smiled from ear to ear as he watched her brighten up for the first time in the day. "You guys love each other a lot, right?" he asked out of the blue.

"Yeah," Nandini blurted out happily and paused as she realized what she had just heard. Her smile faded away as a strong wave of questions walloped her mind. "We... are just friends," she clarified with a hint of doubt in her voice. But she wasn't sure anymore. Are we? Are we really just friends? Or are we in love? Am I in love...? With Manik?

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