You never really imagine how bad it's going to be. You prepare yourself for the worst possible scenario because that's how you've been brought up, to always analyse all the variables and the possibilities. You know it's bound to happen, you've seen so many people go through the same. But when it happens to you, no matter how well you're prepared for it, you're left with a person who looks like you, talks like you, behaves like you, but is just not you.
Pain and sadness had always eluded me. Those two words basically described how I felt when Barcelona lost to Chelsea in the Ucl semis. In these last few months, pain and sadness found a new definition. The sheer magnitude of pain you experience when you know you've lost her forever, not just as someone to kiss the fuck out of or as someone who's hand you wish to hold for as long as possible but as a friend and your best friend, is indescribable. It leaves you on the bathroom floor crying like you've never cried before with your mom sleeping in the next room and all of her memories sleeping in yours.
