Sad stories

Why are you against me?

I was on my phone just texting away to my friends. It is a fun life and I never really go out much only to school but I love to see all of my friends reactions to the stupid stuff I do and say. 

I decided to add a friend that I haven't talked to or seen on over a year in real life but I have texted her. She moved across the state and I miss her so bad! I wanna hug her but she changed a ton and I know people are supposed to change but now she has changed me.

 We are both so perverted in the mind that its funny. Well I got on and she started to talk about my past experience with boys and her boys at her school. Once I read about her talking about my past I could so depressed. I don't like to remember my past. It is such a hard thing to forget and I wish I had amnesia to take all the pain away from my past. 

She just talked about two boys that I dated and said that they were never mine to begin with. How could she say that! They were mine because I dated them. She doesn't know anything but She kept talking. She asked if I were there and I asked her why she would talk about this and she said because its a free world to speak what she wants and she thought they would like to know but I just got angry and my eyes would not pour out anymore tears. 

The boys that I dated both cheated on me with others girls because they had meat in them and they were so much more fun and sexy to hang around with. I got so mad. And now a lot of guys like my best friend and want to date her and she tells me all about this and some of my guy friends have thought she was sexy and hot too. Even a guy that I liked liked her and that threw me off the edge. She has always been much more beautiful and more fun and interesting to hang out with while I am sitting out being the ugly weird and hyper one. 

Now people won't talk to me and think I am annoying at school because I am loud (that's what she said). But now she is flirting with all they guys and tried to make points with them why my life is bad and I just left the group chat. Everyone then asked me why I left and I was thinking in my head 'REALLY!?' Nobody gets me. 

I am depressing and sometimes over react I know but I do have some stuff about me that is interesting too. I can be fun. And besides I've been doing my own things and been searching up some counseling tips to help my friends if they are upset so I can help because I really love to help my friends. I usually don't put myself first but now this has gone too far and now I am gonna put myself first and tell myself now Not to trust anybody or else I will get hurt in the process.