Too Broken To Be Fixed

Chapter One

SHIZUKO meaning quiet child.  静子

 Eleven years ago. 

"Mommy, what are you doing?" I whined,  as my mommy tossed all of her clothes in a bag and walked around her room. "Mommy?"

"Shh... Shizuko, what have I told you before." My mother looked over at me, anger flashing in her eyes as she shoved  more items in her bag. 

"Don't talk unless I am addressed or else I would have a harder beating." I whispered as I watched her. 

"Good girl, now listen to mommy, ok? I may have hurt you a few times but that never meant that I never loved you. I have to leave your father, he's a bad man, but it's also your fault. I never wanted a child, but once you were born, you made my life worse. I couldn't finish my years in college, I had to get a part time job at McDonalds. I still love you though. I may never see you again. Try to leave your father as soon as possible, ok baby?" My mother said before she left me in her and daddy's white walled room. 

"Mommy?" I whispered as she closed  the front door. My five year old mind couldn't comprehend what she meant by daddy being a bad man and having to leave. 

For the next month I stayed by the door, hoping that one day she will come through the door and say she was just on vacation, but that never happened. 

After she left, daddy has been beating me worse and worse saying it was my fault that mommy left. I think daddy gave up also on her coming back home. 

One night, I gave up on everything. On things getting better with daddy, mommy coming back, but nothing ever changed. I broke down in tears, streaming down my face, sobs. I totally forgot daddy was home and he hates when I cry, he says I'm obnoxious and whiny. 

"Shut up bitch!" My father shouted and to add affect he banged on the wall. I couldn't stop though, the more he banged the louder I cried. I heard him stomp to his door slam it against the wall and come to my door. "Bitch, I told you to shut the fuck up. Don't you understand that other people live in this house?" He spat in my face. 

He took his belt out of his pants and showed off the metal clip. "You're going to get it now bitch." As he advanced towards me I whimpered and backed up into the wall, shaking my head in fear. Once my body felt the first lash, it gave up. After awhile I forgot about how many times he lashed me. He left soon, leaving me cold in my own blood. 

"Bitch you better have your bags packed, you're going to be left at the orphanage in the town over tomorrow." Daddy shouted from the other room. What? My mind couldn't process anything right now. 

I just kind of listened to him and packed my clothes up, of what little I have. I went to the bathroom and decided to clean the open wounds I have and went to bed. 

I woke up to the sound of my dad stomping around my house, slamming cupboard door open and shut. 

"Bitch get out of bed and grab your bags we're leaving right now. You will not tell anyone how you got any of those cuts or bruises." He fiercely whispered in my ear as he dragged me out to the car and threw me in the back. 

After about half an hour we pulled up to a large house that looked fairly clean. Brookline isn't that nice of a town. 

"Get out bitch!" He yelled at me. As soon as I step foot out of the car he peeled out. 

Not really knowing what to do, I walked up to the front door of the orphanage and knocked a few times. 

After a few minutes, the door before me swung open, towering over me was nice looking old lady. Her hair was turning from a charcoal black to a silvery gray. She was wearing a white apron over a floral shirt and  shorts that were khakis. 

"Oh! Hello? How'd you end up here, sweetie?" She asked as she wiped her hands on her apron. 

"My daddy dropped me o-off." I whispered looking down at my shoes, which were covered mud. 

"Oh baby, My names Amina, let's get you inside before you freeze." Amina said and ushered me into the house. 

After a few months of living there, people coming in and taking one look at me and seeing the bruises and scars, and leaving me here and taking another child. 

There was this one couple that thought about taking me in and then left. Never took a child with them. They came back again this time, and decided to take me with them. No matter how hard they tried to get me to talk I wouldn't. 

"Sweetie? What's your name?" The lady asked, she had platinum blonde hair, a slim face, with makeup. Her eyes were a cold green-gray colour. 

"She hasn't talked to anyone since she got here, here name is Shizuko." Amina said as she looked down at me. 

"Aw, poor baby," The tall man whispered to his wife. He had brown hair that was styled up a bit, and gray eyes.  

"We want her." He said.