My grandmother used to tell me
" Aapka pati bhagwan ke prashad ki tarha hota hai..usme kitne kaju hai Kitna ghee hai ye nahi dekhte...jaisa hai vaise apna lena!" I mumbled.
"But I don't like you."My few hours old husband said frustrated and angrily.
"You sleep on the bed,I'll arrange my bed on the floor"I said again still keeping,my eyes on the ground.My grandmother's voice still roared in my ears "never match your husband's eyesight."
The next few weeks this was a routine. Only the necessary formal talking and no glances.I hardly remember how my husband looks like.I hadn't yet unpacked my luggage because my self esteem didn't allow me.How could I think it's my house unless and until my husband accepts me as his wife.I used to make him food,wash his clothes,do everything that a wife would do.
I worked at an IT company at a fairly good position.Soon,I rejoined.I thank my stars for that because waiting for him and nothing else to do made me go crazy.My job was my escape.
One night I left for home earlier than usual.I opened the house only to hear some voice overs.It was my husband.
"She won't be home for another hour. Come back to bed."He whined.My husband was cheating on me. Well,truth be told I expected he would be cheating on me from day One.
I lost all the left over respect I ever had for him. I had enough of him.
Barging into the room,the girl beneath him was shocked and terrified.He quickly covered themselves.
"Listen...I can explain..
"Ohh,don't bother.I just came to take my,luggage. I'll send you the divorce papers soon!"I smiled and walked towards the luggage.
"You didn't tell me your married to her. You said you were in a live in relationship"she naked girl shouted.
"Of course he didn't tell you that.Anyway you could move in if you want" I passed a sly smile towards her.
Reaching the door,I turned around finding him still in shock and wonder
"Thank you for setting me free" I smiled.I looked him in the eye this time.It was the first time that we locked in our gaze.The first time I saw his face.Looking at his expression I felt I needed a set back just to come back just as strong and solid.
I didn't wait for him to answer.I turned and went away.That night I stayed at my friend's place who already knew the whole story.Tears made down my cheek.But not because I left,because I regretted why didn't I do it any sooner.
You need a partner who would love you and care for you,but above all that respect you from within.
