I have never been loved
And now that I am
I'm afraid of what's next to come ,
And it's..
Heart break
I have seen them never stand
by ,
In the bad times when we
needed them
And the one excuse they
have
Is that we can never be one
of those gems.
They don't wanna spend
their money,
But my father is not their
ATM card
And sometimes then I doubt
That's who he is
Isn't he ?
I wonder when we'll leave
them all
And go live somewhere else,
Where my dad isn't just an
ATM card
and the fights ,
Aren't where the fight's won't
even exist !
I see him playing games on
my mothers phone
Claiming it
as its his "Own"
And I see him as the pain
grows in my heart
Until it becomes unbearably
hard ...
And as I loose my appetite
and throw my plate in my
room
Cry my heart out and then
scream it all out by the
moon.
It has been nights and I can't
sleep,
And now I think and bitterly
laugh as I have become
numb,
Tears have dried inside me
and all I want is to go away
from it all.
What bad did I did before ,
Is this what I really
deserve ?
And then I see how imperfect
I am ,
Imperfect enough to even not
fit in with my friends circle.
I thought my friends or that's
what the call themselves,
I thought they'd see past my
words,
Thought that they would
hold me while I cry and tell
me all gonna be okay !
