Chapter One.

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I hadn't seen her in four years and had trained myself to forget about us, the whole bit of it. Yet when she came into that room, I couldn't help but stare. She was just as beautiful as I remembered, perhaps even more now. She hadn't noticed me yet and I watched as she walked gracefully to her designated group of people. She greeted them all so genuinely and lifted the spirits of the room; made it glow full of her own energy. I debated on grabbing her attention but decided I'd wait and admire her a bit longer. I watched her talk and laugh and even embarrass herself on purpose to make others happy. Then she walked over in my direction and I stared intently at her all the while. She noticed.

"Justin, is that really you?" she called out, approaching me. The light dress she was wearing exposed a bit of cleavage and I couldn't help but steal a glance.

"Cara, hey. Didn't know you'd be here," I lied. "It's been a while."

She smiled and nodded. "Four years this November," she said. "I'm certainly glad to see you again."

I smiled back at her as she brought her arms up to hug me. She embraced me tightly and intimately, and I could feel her pressing on me. Something twitched behind my zipper.

She wasn't doing it on purpose. I knew its how she usually displayed her friendly gestures. I wasn't complaining, it was a little something for me as well.

"I'm certainly glad to see you too," I told her. Someone had called her name from behind so she excused herself from me and went to see what they'd wanted. And I just stared. I couldn't help it.

Another twitch.
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Later that evening, we reunited. I made sure to accidentally bump into her again. We talked over a few glasses of chardonnay in the blue gardens near the back. The loud music coming from the dramatically large palace we were both at seemed to drown everything else out and we were okay with it. Men and girls came and went like moths surrounding the bright lights from inside the mansion. They were even brighter now that the sun had set and the yellow cocktail music didn't seem to have an end.

The air was live with chatter and laughter and people had seemed to completely loosen their worries as feelings stirred and they let themselves go. A colleague of mine had invited me to this wild place and at first, I'd hesitated. That is, until I heard the mention of her name. Caralynn Braun had been the face of New York for a while now and she had a face you just couldn't forget.

"Life has been good to me," she told me. "I've been everywhere yet I've had a very bad time, Justin. I know I should be grateful for all it's offered me. I know that. But I haven't entirely been all there, do you understand that even a little bit? What it's like?"

I hesitated. Of course I understood it and I think I even understood what she was meaning by it. "Forgive me, I wouldn't know." 

She nodded disappointingly and took a drink from her glass. People were running around us now, holding objects, throwing decorations, having rebellious fun. I stared at her face and examined her subtle frown.

Now perhaps, just like I had, she'd managed to forget about the past. It was the best thing a girl like her could do. I was penniless and she was a diamond. Her voice was filled with money. It was a voice you'd be willing to hear forever. I had to admit to myself that I missed her. I was missing out but it was all necessary. I cleared my throat and she turned to look at me.

"It's quite alright," she whispered.

I wanted nothing more than to grab her hand and give her a kiss that'd perhaps refresh her memory. But I knew it'd be wrong. I knew it wouldn't be fair to her. It was selfish.

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